NubianSouls Locks...

Loc-Licious Fridays: Viola Davis

2012-02-10T06:25:00.009-05:00

Happy Friday everyone! We finally made it to the end of the week! Anyone doing anything special this week? Given that it's the weekend before Valentine's day, I'm sure the restaurants will be full of lovebirds, roses and plenty of chocolate! No Valentine's for me, but I will definitely sneak in a Cadbury Fruit & Nut and maybe some Lindor just because...

Well today's featured person for Loc-Licious Fridays is The Help actress Viola Davis, who has been nominated for the Academy Award for Best Actress, and has won a Screen Actors Guild Award for The Help. Even though she doesn't rock locks, I thought I had to share some pictures that were posted the other day from LA Times Magazine:

Now, what does this comparison picture tell you about the beauty of natural hair? EVERYTHING! Viola looks absolutely gorgeous without the weave and I believe that she should sport this look more often.

I really do understand that maintaining natural hair is hard work, but I notice with her, and a lot of other people that I know, that your confidence changes: you look and act brighter, the stature changes....it's such a noticeable and positive change. I'm not saying that anyone wearing a weave or a wig is horrible, not at all, but just look at the before and after pictures, and tell me that Viola's natural look just brought out her beauty even more?

I am so in love with these pictures, and she's rocking her natural fro' like no one's business! These are so elegant yet fierce! I hope to see Viola Davis with a look like this more often; I know this definitely made some people out there decide to go for the Big Chop! Thank you LA Times Magazine for doing this photo shoot! Yes, be sure to check out the write-up on Viola in their February feature!

What do you think? Should Viola Davis leg go of the weaves and wigs and rock her natural fro?

Farewell to Toronto-Lime: Shutting its doors after 16 years of greatness

2012-02-08T11:38:00.001-05:00

This morning I read a tweet saying that, after 16 years of bringing sweet music to our ears, Toronto Lime will be closing its doors. Say what now? I am sad to hear about this because this was my source for Soca music and parties for many years! And it still is! I remember back in high school, I would rush home and listen to “chunes” dating back to my diaper days until it was time to hit the sack. I would also check out pictures from various fetes to see who was there, and to also see if I was caught in some getting on real bad ~~and if the dude I was talking to having a sweet wine on some other chick~~. Remember when Wukupnuff was notorious for that?! Remember that site? I would check that the morning after a fete to make sure I wasn't in any of the pics...that was definitely the Soca Big Brother in terms of calling people out! Memories....

Aside from that, I found a write-up about the website on DSoca.com which gives an explanation as to why founder Jef Lo decided to let go of something that brought Toronto Soca Heads up-to-date with what’s happening in music as well as parties:

Founder and president, Jef Lo announced today that TORONTO-LIME.com will be no more after 16 years online. After being touted the number one Caribbean website for so many years the question is why?

"It's time for me to move on" says Jef. "In the initial start-up, the mission was to give Caribbean content a place on the worldwide web. Back in 1996, the only information that would appear in a search engine for the keywords 'Soca/Calypso' was about Harry Belafonte. Over the years TORONTO-LIME.com has inspired many to post their knowledge and content online. Today there’s nothing Caribbean you cannot Google. I think I've reached my goal."

When asked if this was a move to early retirement, Jef said laughingly, "Business was good, but not that good." According to Mr. Lo, his immediate plans are to take some time off before returning to his other business (Soca Bookings), where his focus will now lie in artist management and public relations.

TORONTO-LIME.com is now officially off-line. The highly prominent domain name will be up for sale within the next few weeks and speculation on how high bidding will reach for the heavily sought-after brand is anyone's guess.

I happened to meet Jef Lo not too long ago and he is such a sweetheart; we all understand that there’s a time for growth and I’m definitely not knocking him for that. In order for people to grow, they need to let go of something, right? I would like to thank him for creating such a great site that kept me up-to-date with the newest Soca “chunes” as well as keeping it consistent all these years. It’s very sad to see Toronto-lime go but I wish him all the best in his future endeavours. Who knows, since the domain name will be up for sale in the next few weeks, there may be another Toronto-based individual who will keep up with what’s hot on the Caribbean scene!

Thanks again, Jef and Toronto-Lime!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Marathon Virgin Chronicles: Nike Free Run+ 2 Running Shoes

2012-02-08T06:25:00.012-05:00

Like the title? lol...I didn't realize how many people signed up for the SportingLife 10k marathon until now...I know I've convinced a lot of people to sign up, but there are so many others that I know that are jumping on the marathon bandwagon, and I'm loving it!

So to those who registered early and received their $50 SportingLife gift card in the mail, make sure you take advantage of that gift and buy something useful for the upcoming race. Even though the race is three months away, time is going by VERY quickly! I do periodically check out the online store to see what I can purchase from time to time...I haven't quite yet decided on what I should buy, but for those who don't have the right running shoes, or any running shoes at all, I suggest you take a look at these:

Nike Free Run+ 2

I have problem feet....meaning they are extremely fat, w i d e, and they sometimes look like one of those french rolls that you see at a wedding reception. So when I became frequent at the gym, my first thought was to get custom made orthotics and specialized running shoes so that I would be able to work out pain free (at that time I had knee problems, and was banned from running on the treadmill as well). But then I found that the shoes were a bit too heavy to walk around with for one, and that they were kind of uncomfortable to wear when I was at Socacize. So I started looking for a lighter pair of runners that would be easier to carry, and to execute those oh-so-crazy moves at Socacize. My sister had a pass to go to the Nike Factory in Scarborough, so we decided to hit that up, and that's where I found the Nike Free Run+ 2 shoe.

I'm definitely not a shoe fanatic like some people I know, but these are by far the best pair of Nikes that I have ever purchased. Not only are they SUPER lightweight, they are extremely comfortable (which is quite shocking to me because they normally fit quite narrow). They are available for both men and women, so don't watch the purple shade! I don't need to use my orthotic insoles with these shoes, and they are GREAT for running! I'm still unable to run on the treadmill (because of the impact), but I notice a big difference when I hit the pavement outdoors! So I definitely say try these shoes one! Hint hint, nudge, nudge! So for those who are looking for a great lightweight running shoe, the Nike Free Run+ are definitely something you should take a look at. I happened to purchase mine for $85, but the prices vary from store to store.

For those who are still considering the SportingLife 10k, there's still an incentive available. If you sign up by February 29th, you will receive a $40 SL gift card along with a Nike Dri-fit T-shirt...Registration is $40 as well, so what are you waiting for?

Who's meeting me at the Start/Finish Line? Have you signed up for any other Marathon? I still can't believe that I signed up for this....but I have more up my sleeve! Stay tuned!

Black History Month Inspired Book: The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks

2012-02-07T06:25:00.002-05:00

This past Thursday was payday, so during my lunch break, I did what I normally do best, which is to shop with the money I should be saving for important things. Anyways, I decided to head over to Chapters to see what kind of books they had featured for Black History Month. There was a pretty generous collection in the BHM section of the store, giving me the temptation of snatching 5 books, knowing that I could get it much cheaper online...

While I was looking for one particular book, I was approached by an employee who suggested that I read a book called The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks. He told me that it is more science-related but a great book nonetheless. Written by Rebecca Skloot, she "documents the histories of both the HeLa cell line and the Lacks family." Here's a synopsis of the story from Bookbrowse.com of this individual and how Henrietta Lacks and her family unknowingly became an important element in the world of science:

Her name was Henrietta Lacks, but scientists know her as HeLa. She was a poor Southern tobacco farmer who worked the same land as her slave ancestors, yet her cells—taken without her knowledge—became one of the most important tools in medicine. The first “immortal” human cells grown in culture, they are still alive today, though she has been dead for more than sixty years. If you could pile all HeLa cells ever grown onto a scale, they’d weigh more than 50 million metric tons—as much as a hundred Empire State Buildings. HeLa cells were vital for developing the polio vaccine; uncovered secrets of cancer, viruses, and the atom bomb’s effects; helped lead to important advances like in vitro fertilization, cloning, and gene mapping; and have been bought and sold by the billions.

Yet Henrietta Lacks remains virtually unknown, buried in an unmarked grave.

Now Rebecca Skloot takes us on an extraordinary journey, from the “colored” ward of Johns Hopkins Hospital in the 1950s to stark white laboratories with freezers full of HeLa cells; from Henrietta’s small, dying hometown of Clover, Virginia — a land of wooden slave quarters, faith healings, and voodoo — to East Baltimore today, where her children and grandchildren live and struggle with the legacy of her cells.

Henrietta’s family did not learn of her “immortality” until more than twenty years after her death, when scientists investigating HeLa began using her husband and children in research without informed consent. And though the cells had launched a multimillion-dollar industry that sells human biological materials, her family never saw any of the profits. As Rebecca Skloot so brilliantly shows, the story of the Lacks family — past and present — is inextricably connected to the dark history of experimentation on African Americans, the birth of bioethics, and the legal battles over whether we control the stuff we are made of.

Over the decade it took to uncover this story, Rebecca became enmeshed in the lives of the Lacks family—especially Henrietta’s daughter Deborah, who was devastated to learn about her mother’s cells. She was consumed with questions: Had scientists cloned her mother? Did it hurt her when researchers infected her cells with viruses and shot them into space? What happened to her sister, Elsie, who died in a mental institution at the age of fifteen? And if her mother was so important to medicine, why couldn’t her children afford health insurance?
Intimate in feeling, astonishing in scope, and impossible to put down, The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks captures the beauty and drama of scientific discovery, as well as its human consequences. -from Bookbrowse

It's so interesting, yet so unnerving to discover how people were treated fifty years ago. Black men and women were put through many experiments without the care or concern (or by orders of their superior) of the individuals administering it. Have you heard of the Tuskegee syphilis experiment? Six hundred impoverished African-Americans were involved in a clinical study which focused on the natural progression of untreated syphilis. These individuals unknowingly participated in this study on the onus they would have "free health care," but it was really a medical experiment on a group of people, to see if the medical experts' hypotheses were indeed true. The last time I checked, we were not the products of MythBusters. Check out the link above- when I first discovered this years ago, it gave me a chill up my spine. It instantly made me wonder what other "procedures" were performed on African-Americans while failing to disclose it's real purpose.

I haven't read the Immortal Life of Henriett Lacks yet (just like some others), but this will definitely be the first one I crack open after I finish up on a couple of assignments that I really don't feel like doing...funny how I can write a blog in a few minutes, yet it would take me days just to complete an assignment...

Have any of you read this book? What do you think of it? How do you feel about science's previous mistreatment of Blacks in this society? Have you heard of any other "experiments" that took place? Let me know! I would like to read up on that as well!

Loc-Licious Fridays: Dreadlock Bun Updo

2012-02-03T06:25:00.006-05:00

It's Loc-Licious Friday! I'm going to post a few pictures of various dreadlock bun updos which are great for a night out on the town! I have done a couple of updos and I think they are fun to wear, for you can style them to the side (which I normally prefer) or on the top like these two pictures.

These are very simple hairstyles which do not require too many accessories such as hairties and/or pins. Check out the video tutorial below from one of my favourites, Chescalocs, on how to do a curly lock bun!

So, I'll be quite intermittent with blogging for the next couple of days- I have so much work to do in so little time. I still haven't mastered the work/life/blog/school balance (hence why this blog is a very short one) but I'm working on it...despite all of that, I hope everyone has a great weekend! It's SUPERBOWL TIME! Who are you cheering for? Enjoy the games, but be safe! We all know the Budweiser will be flowing like the Amazon river in all restaurants....

My Loc-bun

Black History Month in T.O: Some Things to Look out For

2012-02-02T06:25:00.016-05:00

William Hall

February 1st marks the first day of Black History Month- a month where people around the globe pay homage to the defeats and victories of Black people in the past and present. During this month, we celebrate by highlighting the many goals and accomplishments of many individuals who changed the world, whether it was through music, politics, literature, medicine or sports. Even though we shouldn’t just be celebrating Black History Month for just 29 days of the year, we still have come a long way. And, although the Black society still has some quirks to iron out, we are becoming stronger and stronger as time goes by.

Since I am a Canuck, I want to recognize for the start of Black History Month an outstanding man who goes by the name of Lawrence Hill. Mr. Hill is an award-winning Canadian author who is best known for his books, Black Berry, Sweet Juice, and my absolute favourite, The Book of Negroes. He has received “honorary doctorates from the University of Toronto, Wilfred Laurier University and the University of Waterloo, the Bob Edwards Award from the Alberta Theatre Projects, and was named Author of the Year by Go On Girl, the largest African-American women's book club in the United States."

“Africa is my homeland. But I have weathered enough migrations for five lifetimes.”

- Aminata Diallo

The Book of Negroes had me engaged from start to finish: it felt as if I was in the room with the main character, Aminata Diallo herself, standing right beside her through her journey from the Motherland to North America and back to her original homeland. Black History Canada created an awesome Black History and Canada Education Guide which provides a description as well as an excerpt from Lawrence Hill’s book to illustrate the ordeal of this astonishing woman:

“Aminata’s experience, like that of many African-Canadians, is defined by her migration—to America, Canada, Africa, and finally England. Uprooted by the triangular slave trade which brought captives from Africa to Europe, the Caribbean and North America, Aminata became part of the African Diaspora.”

The following passage describes the beginning of Aminata’s first ocean-crossing as a captive bound for slavery in America in Hills' book:

“I dreaded the big boat up ahead, growing larger with each oar stroke. In size, it dwarfed a twelve-man canoe, and it stank worse than the pen they had put us in on the island. The boat terrified me, but I was even more afraid of sinking deep into the salty water, with no possibility for my spirit to return to my ancestors... I clenched my teeth and looked out over the water at all my people tied in canoes and being pushed, prodded and pulled up a long plank rising along the great wall of the ship. I turned back to see my homeland. There were mountains in the distance. One of them rose like an enormous lion. But all its power was trapped on the land. It could do nothing for any of us out on the water.”

If you haven’t read this book as yet, I suggest that you head to your local book store and purchase one. It is available at the Canadian bookstores as The Book of Negroes, and in the United States, Australia and New Zealand as Someone Knows my Name. Trust me, it’s a book that you will definitely not be able to put down! In addition to the book, there are a lot of events happening here in Toronto to celebrate Black History Month. Check out the events listed on TD Bank's website as well as the Toronto Star to find out what is happening in your city. For example, on February 2nd, the Canadian Film Centre and Clement Virgo presents Black Women in Cinema- Inspiring Role Models which includes an evening in conversation with the beautiful Pam Grier, hosted by Sharon Lewis. Check it out!!

Too much to handle at once? How about taking small steps to a big goal

2012-02-01T06:25:00.004-05:00

One Step at a Time

I know many people are jumping on the fitness wagon, which is absolutely great! I have been reading many blogs about fitness initiatives as well as listening to people who say they are ready to take the next step in terms of their fitness goals. The more I hear about these goals, the more I maintain the belief that we have become more health conscious than ever before and that we will continue to be this way as more interactive and enjoyable workout programs emerge.

Some may be able to handle going all out when they begin a new fitness program, partly because they have been physically active prior-to. But for those who are dipping their feet in the pond for the first time may find that it can be overwhelming for their bodies. I remember the first time I attended a Les Mill's Body Pump class. Since I was a regular at the gym, I thought that adding extra 'first timer' weight wouldn't be a problem. But then I struggled the next day- I cried as I walked up and down the steps, and nearly fainted when I had to lift my arm to do something. My girl warned me that I should take it light, but I had a case of hard ears. I eventually learned my lesson and told myself that I need to take small steps in order to get to the same level as the others who attended the class. I just had to learn that achieving a particular level of fitness doesn't happen with a snap of a finger. With small steps and some minor adjustments, one can reach their full fitness potential. Check out some pointers that I have come up with which may help you with your new or continuous fitness journey:

1. When it comes to weights, increase them incrementally. That way you can avoid such injuries as muscle strain. Worse, a torn muscle. Not only do injured muscles take a while to heal, it may turn you off from going back to where you started. So, start off small and work your way up to heavier weights.

2. When training for a race/marathon, start off with short distances, and then work your way up to your desired distance and stride. Starting off with sprints might only get you to a couple hundred meters. For example, I'm training for the upcoming Sporting Life 10K race in May. I have never ran 10K in my life, so I am starting off by running 5K, and increasing my distance every couple of runs. That way, I won't have to struggle in the end.

3. If you're cutting particular foods from your diet (not necessarily going on a diet), do it in stages. For example, if you have a habit of eating chocolate on a daily basis, try to cut it down to 3x a week, then 2x then once. That way, you won't have much of a craving, and when you do have one, you won't to H.A.M and whop off a whole 1kg Toblerone bar in 3 minutes flat.

4. While your cutting down on the junk food, increase your intake on fruits and veggies. Top up on fruits that are rich in antioxidants such as blueberries, grapefruits, strawberries, and kiwi fruit. Even though veggies may not be everyone's favourite, dark leafy greens and legumes such as spinach and black beans are best. Increasing your intake with these will help you get your mojo going.

5. Get light-headed while doing up-and-down exercises such as squats and lunges? Your iron may be low! If your iron deficient, then you should purchase some iron supplements at your local food store. A friend of mine suggested I try a liquid supplement called Floradix which helps those who suffer from iron deficiency. I definitely have to take a look at that since I too get a case of dizziness, fatigue, and a rapid pulse. If you feel that way when working out, STOP and REST!

6. Speaking of which, get your rest! Don't over-exert yourself when it comes to exercise, especially if it is high in intensity. If you are physically exhausted, you are at risk of injury. The elliptical machine will not run away. Go home and rest, your body will be recharged and you'll be able to take on the workout the next day.

7. Learn how to breathe when working out. Not a lot of people realize how important breathing techniques are when one is exercising. I have a habit of. Sucking in my lips and pressing them together. Not only do I have difficulty maintaining a good heart rate, doing this causes my muscles to tense. I may not be a newbie to fitness (for I am an instructor lol), but I'm still taking small steps to reach my fitness goal.

8. Put away the things that may distract you from concentrating on working out. Talking to your girlfriend on the phone while dancing on the treadmill isn't a good mix. You may catch a good laugh, but that might not end well. I did speak about this in a previous post (I'm sorry- I can never get enough of that clip): put the cell phone away. An hour to yourself just might do you good!

So ladies and gents, if you're on the road to a greater level of fitness, don't let anyone stop you! But always learn never to take on more than you can handle. Learn to take smaller steps in order to take stride on such a great initiative. I hope these tips are able to help you a bit. Feel free to write a comment and suggest other tips on how someone can take steps to increase their physical capabilities.

Have you had to slow it down a bit just to get better at your workout routine? Or were you able to handle it through and through? What is your workout routine like? I'm always curious to know what kind of workouts everyone is into!

Being content, is that enough?

2012-01-31T06:25:00.005-05:00

When I was a young ~~warthog~~ girl, I used to be always told, “Rowena, be content with what you get” when I received something like the smaller slice of red velvet cheesecake, a shirt that wasn’t my favourite colour, or if I got the White Barbie instead of the Black one for Christmas. So I learned at an early age that I should be grateful for the things that I have received for there are kids out there who did not have the luxury of having the same things as we did. So basically I stuck with what was given to me without any complaints because I had the words “be content” engraved in my mind. It might have been the most appropriate rule as a young child, but that mentality definitely wasn’t’ helpful as I got older.

As time went on, I started being content with things that were mediocre, and even though I knew I could have done a better job of things such as school work, my piano lessons and the way I carried myself, being content with what I had was basically all I really knew. I learned, with this mentality, I missed out on a couple of opportunities and it always made me wonder how my life would have been now if I wasn’t so content with what I have/had.

Now, I’ve been hearing the words “don’t settle for less than what you deserve” from all directions. If one knows that he or she deserves something more (e.g. developmental opportunity, pay increase) in the place of employment, then they should speak up, for one wouldn’t know what the outcome could be if one were to just ask. Also, if one knew that he or she was caught up in a relationship or friendship they knew they shouldn’t be in, then one should learn to let go, being assured that there are other people out there who would treat that person better than the last….but that, of course, is easier said than done.

They only way someone can move away from that unwanted “content” feeling is to push themselves to be “harder, better, faster, stronger”…word to Kanye. If one were to keep that mentality, they would be able to go beyond their level of content-ness, leaving them attaining a brand-new feeling of satisfaction. So don't settle for something that you know can be greater than what you currently have. If you're content because of fear that you'll fail, then you would never know what you truly deserve. Napoleon Hill said many things about the fear of failure, and he was one who thought that failure was a step towards greatness...some people are lucky after the first try, but for the majority of us, it's all about trial-and-error. Here are some quotes from Napoleon Hill:

“Most great people have attained their greatest success just one step beyond their greatest failure.”

“When you are able to maintain your own highest standards of integrity - regardless of what others may do - you are destined for greatness.”

“Before success comes in any man’s life, he is sure to meet with much temporary defeat, and, perhaps, some failure. When defeat overtakes a man, the easiest and most logical thing to do is to quit. That is exactly what the majority of men do. More than five hundred of the most successful men this country has ever known told the author their greatest success came just one step beyond the point at which defeat had overtaken them.”

“Most so called FAILURES are only temporary defeats”

In conclusion, being content with what you have at the present moment might not be the best thing for your well being, happiness and success when you know that you have the potential to be happier than a pig in s**t when you learn that failure doesn't mean and end to your pursuit to extreme happiness. Content can be good for some, but for those who feel as if their lives hasn't really started yet, do away with the fear and go after what you really want- you only live once!

What do you think? Are you content in your life, or are you someone who craves for something more? Don't forget to drop me a line at nubiansoulslocks@gmail.com for any questions and comments!

Closer to My Dreams: the Approval Process

2012-01-30T06:25:00.154-05:00

Paul Lachine illustration

These days, it has become increasingly difficult for one person to purchase a single family unit (a.k.a detached home) in North America. There are some parts of the country which are extremely affordable, but for a person like me who lives very close to one of the largest and most densely populated cities in the country, the thought of owning a home in the core makes you want to run to the convenience store to purchase a LottoMax ticket.

According to Moneyville, the average Toronto house price (in 2011) was $465,369, whereas in 2001, the average price of a Toronto home was *sigh* $262,000. That's about a 77.6% increase over the last ten years, and that figure forces one to question their affordability. Many home-wishers have a fear that once they purchase a home, they won't be able to keep up with mortgage payments because of unexpected setbacks (e.g. car & school payments), so their dream to own a home is deferred while the price of homes rise. Then there are some whose eyes are a bit too big for their belly. I'm definitely not saying that one shouldn't go after what they want in life, but there are some instances when a $750,000 home in the Beaches is definitely not reasonable for a person who makes under $35,000 a year....

That's where the pre-approval process comes into play.

I never quite understood what exactly took place in the whole home purchase business until last year, when I decided "yup, time to make some movements." I had an idea of what needed to be done, but I needed to figure out the step-by-step process in order to fully understand what it takes to finally own a home. In my first post about the dreams of purchasing a home, I spoke of some ways in which one can save money towards their downpayment. So what's a person to do when they feel as if there's enough in the money pot to take the next step?

A pre-approval is the process in which individuals who are interested in purchasing a home approach a lender, such as a bank or a mortgage broker company, who will check ones credit in order to verify their income, and would then "provide assurances they would be able to get a loan up to a certain amount." According to Homefinder, "a mortgage pre-approval helps potential home buyers streamline their search by providing a realistic price range and budget to work within." Also, a pre-approved mortgage "can give a home hunter a potential leg up on the competition, as sellers are more likely to accept offers from a buyer who has already secured financing." In order to secure the pre-approved mortgage, individuals would have to provide the mortgage broker with a breakdown of their employment history and income information (e.g. two pay stubs from your place of employment), a listing of assets and liabilities (e.g. do you own your car? How much credit card debt do you have?), and an approximate down payment for the home (e.g. how much have you saved so far?). After analyzing these parameters, the mortgage lender would "be able to provide a rough estimate of the mortgage amount for which the buyer qualifies." It is recommended that, prior to booking an appointment with a bank or mortgage company for a pre-approval, you should check out an online mortgage calculator to run some numbers on your own. You can check out the Mortgage Calculator Canada for details.

According to Homefinder, after retrieving all of the requirements, the mortgage lender would be able to provide the individual with more information on the various mortgage options and "recommend a lending solution" that is best suited to their situation. One thing to remember is that this pre-approval is the FIRST step towards obtaining a mortgage. In order to be officially approved, one would have to complete a mortgage application and provide the mortgage lender the appropriate documentation to perform a check on one's credit and financial history. Once this step has been completed, the mortgage lender would be able to provide the individual with a mortgage amount that you can be approved for.

Homefinder also indicates that, having this information gives someone a better idea on the interest rate that would be charged on the loan. With the mortgage pre-approval, one would "receive a conditional commitment in writing that states the exact mortgage amount, term, interest rate, and expiration date." For those who are in the same boat as I am, the article on Moneyville, called "Why it's a good time to buy a home" says that mortgage rates are at historic lows, and they can't get any lower. This article advises that we should "lock in now" because the mortgage rates have "nowhere to go but up" within the next year. According to this article "Four to five-year fixed mortgages at 3 per cent are unheard of," so basically now is the time to get serious!

Below are some benefits of an income verified mortgage pre-approval which can provide those who wish to purchase a home with the knowledge and security they need to start house hunting with confidence:

1) A firm budget

Once a home buyer has been pre-approved for a mortgage they'll know exactly how much money they can spend on a home, as well as what their biweekly or monthly mortgage payment will be.

2) Increased negotiating power

Mortgage pre-approval is a good step to take before shopping for a home because it shows the sellers that you're ready to commit to a purchase. In fact, in some housing markets, it's practically required that you're pre-approved in order for your offer to be reviewed.

Sounds like a lot of work huh? So for those who want that house near the Beaches, it's best to speak with a mortgage specialist first before you jump into something that may get you into trouble. Other than that, you have nowhere to go but up (just like these mortgage rates :|)! All joke aside, home ownership is a serious commitment, so one has to make sure they have all of their "ducks in a row" and disciplined in order to go through this process!

What do you think? Are any of you in the house hunting process as I am? let me know your thoughts!! And, don't hesitate to shoot me an email at nubiansoulslocks@gmail.com for any questions on locks, natural hair, products, or about any posts that I have written...I'd love to hear from you!!!!

Loc-Licious Fridays: Ledisi

2012-01-27T06:25:00.026-05:00

Ledisi- Two-toned Hairstyle

TGIF everyone!!! We finally made it to the end of the week- hope you all have a restful but but awesome weekend, I know I definitely need the rest for I had an extremely exhausting work week!

Ledisi with long FIREY red locks

Anyways, I had a real treat while looking through the Essence Magazine online that it inspired me to come up with the idea to be on the hunt for amazing looking lock pictures and post them every Friday (it's about time, huh?)

For Essence's Hairstyle File, they featured Ledisi, who is a gorgeous, brown skinned woman who has such an amazing voice! I have all of her albums and I love each of them to bits!

Ledisi w/ Mocha hue

The "Pieces of Me" singer has been locking her hair about 5-6 years now, and the pictures show that she has done a great job at maintaining her locks, rocking them with beautiful shades. She went from natural black, to a Mocha colour, to a bold red which really suits her.

Signature Hairstyle

I would love to try and find a way to rock Ledisi's signature style one day- it would be a great style to go out with either casually or formally. When I do get around to it, I will definitely post pictures and a video blog and show others how they can achieve her look.

Ledisi letting her hair down

Girl Ledisi, thank you for blessing us with your gorgeous locks!!! They are definitely inspiring!! You need to come to the T-dot for a performance!!

Colour Me: The Film...coming to Toronto

2012-01-26T06:25:00.074-05:00

Colour Me Documentary

It's almost the weekend, ya'll! Just take a few deep breaths and it will be here in no time!

My co-worker sent me a link yesterday passing along information about an upcoming documentary called Colour Me. This documentary is about "challenging viewers to reexamine how they think about race."

Created by Taza Media (a Toronto-based web, film, televisioin and commercial production company) founder and former youth worker, Sherien Barsoum and her team "explores critical issues from a fresh lens," which portrays the "Black Canadians’ struggle for identity."

According to the Colour Me website, the film follows "motivational speaker Anthony McLean as he runs a groundbreaking mentorship program for black teens in Brampton, the most demographically changing Canadian city. While challenging his students to analyse and abandon the stereotypes they have accepted, Anthony is forced to critically examine his own identity."

While watching the two-minute trailer of this documentary, I immediately had the understanding of what this film is trying to get viewers to see: The attempt to make a change for the black community, and to attain the ability to recognize our true identity as a Black individual, without being inundated with stereotypes which does absolutely nothing but degrade the image of the Black individual into something negative that other races will always remember us as being correlated with. It doesn't help that the Black community here in Toronto is constantly dealing with murders due to gun violence (like the recent shooting of a Barber named "Chrissy" at his place of employment)...we always hear that some Blacks "don't fit the stereotype" when they want to do something that is not labelled as "Black," such as playing a sport that has a large White ratio...or even having exceptional grades in school ("look at your report card, you're the stereotype"). I hear the quotes "you're so ghetto" or "use whiteness when its beneficial" in this documentary and it makes you realize that, yes, things DO need to change in the Black community.

The trailer ended with the Black National Anthem, "Lift Every Voice and Sing" as well as words by Anthony McLean saying that he is “Trying to teach these kids what it means to be black because I don’t really know myself...”

This is something that we should all check out and support. Check out the website, Colour Me The Film, and subscribe to get updates as to when and where the documentary becomes available. It is scheduled to come out in the Spring. Below is a verse of the Black National Anthem which I feel every one should become familiar with, for it describes our constant struggle to rise from the negativity and claim victory for the Black community.

Lift every voice and sing, till earth and heaven ring,

Ring with the harmonies of liberty;

Let our rejoicing rise, high as the list’ning skies,
Let it resound loud as the rolling sea.

Sing a song full of the faith

that the dark past has taught us,

Sing a song full of the hope

that the present has brought us;

Facing the rising sun of our new day begun,

Let us march on till victory is won.

What do you think of the trailer? Do you feel this this is something that the youths in Toronto needs in order to grow as young adults? I know I will definitely be there to support!

Keeping the Momentum going- Even When You're a Septuguanarian

2012-01-25T06:25:00.060-05:00

Ernestine Shepherd

There are some things which I wish I should have kept up with, but was too shy to do so. It was 8th grade, when we had our regional track and field meet at the local high school. That was the chance to compete with others schools, yet not show too much attitude because we will all be in the same high school in three months’ time. In that particular meet, I decided to compete in the 100, 4x100 and 200 metre races: I didn’t do particularly well in the 100m race (I believe I was in third place), but I completely took people by surprise when I ran the 200m “dash”….I remember having a pair of Patrick Ewing shoes (from Payless- don’t hate, I thought they were fly!), with the big numbers 34 on the outside, my shoes were not tied properly, but I had a crazy lead from beginning to end. That was a surprising accomplishment to me- I wasn’t expecting to receive the “red ribbon” but I was glad to make it to first place.

Now high school started, and when the Track and Field tryouts began, everyone started looking for me to run the relay and 200m sprints. Everyone had the goal of making it to the Provincial meet to show everyone 'who is boss.' And, of course, I shied away from it because I was way too shy to be practicing with the older dudes who were HUGE, muscular, FAST, and were well on their way to a Track & Field scholarship (some stayed all the way through, some were a disappointment), and my music program that I was in basically took over my school life. Although me playing in a school band provided me with the discipline that I needed to get work done, I wasn't able to participate in something that had my heart pumping every time I set foot on the track.

Nowadays, I only imagine what and where I could have been if I continued and put my heart into training, conditioning and ABC's, minus the torn quad in my final year of high school (which happened when I was practicing long jump- days before the qualifying meet. Isn't that something?). Since my high school years have LONG passed, and my dreams of being that super track star has expired and placed on the top shelf, I just need to focus on keeping fit until I too old to remember my name.

"Determined- Dedicated- Disciplined To Be Fit"

I always thought that there was an age limit to which you need to stop exercising like the Yogi-jogging-Zumba fanatic young person, but after looking at someone by the name of Ernestine Shepherd changed all of that. At 75 years of age, this septuagenarian jogs more than TEN miles a day (that's more than the 10K marathon that I have signed up for!) and "puts in upwards to EIGHTY miles a week when training for an upcoming marathon." I know I'm late in giving her shout outs for her accomplishments since there has been many articles made about her. If I did not know any better, I would have thought she was a middle-aged woman who wanted to dye her hair grey, just for the hell of it. Ernestine is just THAT FIT! In the video interviews, the petite woman wears yoga pants and a sports bra, showing everyone her beautiful toned curves. And to think she did this for many years- Ernestine only became fit-conscious in her fifties. She definitely holds the fort in the fitness competitions: check out the video below and look at the host's reaction to her profile when he started off with the introductions:

Because of this, she is now known by the Guinness Book of World Records as the "Oldest Performing Female BodyBuilder" which has me in awe (and makes me suck in my belly too). On her personal website, it indicates that she has been body building, as well as teaching fitness classes for less than twenty years, for she has never "worked out a day in her life" prior to that. On her website, she tells readers her secret to her new and fit life: Ernestine,

Began slowly under the guidance of an expert personal trainer and gradually conditioned her body
Ernestine, realizing early on the importance of good nutrition (including sufficient protein and supplements) sought out the services of a nutritionist
Has the full support of her husband of 52 years, Collin, who prepares meals and makes sure the fridge is always stocked with her seven convenient small balanced daily meals
Makes sure she gets the rest her body needs
Tries to have a positive attitude about everything, views her workouts as fun and sees her work as being on a “long happy journey”
Knows where she wants to go and what she wants to accomplish and do
Believes in encouragement, inspiration and family support and lives by her mantra ” Determined — Dedicated — Disciplined To Be Fit”

"Determined- Dedicated- Disciplined To Be Fit" is a mantra that we should all be taking seriously. If an outstanding woman in her seventies can work towards a level of fitness at such an age, than we honestly don't have an excuse, especially at our younger ages. Furthermore, you should never defer a dream just because you were afraid of what the outcome would be if you went in and gave that goal your best shot. So it's never too late to start (or re-start) on a fitness goal, and, looking at Ernestine, you just keep on going. Everyone's on this fitness tip, so let's not make it the latest fashion trend that will go out of style in a couple of months...this needs to be an ongoing thing!

Kudos to you, Ernestine Shepherd. For more information about her, check out her website at ErnestineShepherd.net.

Where You Started: Eglinton Ave West as the Ethnic Enclave

2012-01-24T06:25:00.001-05:00

I have some great (old) work friends who get me through the day by engaging in conversations ranging from Beyonce’s shenanigans to news about black politicians. There are days where the conversations get heated about a particular topic, but there are other days where I’m laughing so hard that I’m seconds from embarrassing myself. Love them. So today one of my friends sends this picture of a particular restaurant in which we should go for our next lunch get together.

Chat Bout Restaurant

Looking at the picture, and because of the uniqueness of the name, we all assumed that it was on the Eglinton Avenue West strip, and we were correct; from looking at the shipping barrels at the shoppe next door. We got into the conversation about how we have a lot of memories being in that intersection, realizing that some of us originated form that area. Dufferin and Eglinton was and still is the hot-spot for people of West-Indian descent to get their patty- and cocobread fix, get a line-up at the barber shop, get a barrel to ship clothes and food to families still living at "home," or hit up the nearby beauty supply store for products and hair.

This community in the west-end of Toronto has a large population of immigrants from the West-Indies. Just like Chinatown, Little Italy, Greektown, Little India, Koreatown, and Little Somalia, these “ethnic enclaves” provide newcomers with a sense of belongingness, knowing that there are like- minded and cultured individuals nearby to help them transition into the new found country with ease. An Ethnic Enclave is defined by Wikipedia as an “ethnic community which retains some cultural distinction from a larger, surrounding area, it may be a neighborhood, an area or an administrative division based on ethnic groups.” also, “new immigrants and migrants typically settled in neighborhoods with others from their cultural background, and even from their home villages. To city residents who are not part of the community, the ethnic area has become a dining and shopping destination and source of "authentic" ethnic food and groceries, such as Chinese cuisine in Chinatowns and Italian restaurants Little Italys.”

Rap's Restaurant

Places like Eglinton Avenue West provides West-Indian newcomers and long-time citizens an outlet in which is reminiscent to their place of birth. From the supermarket to the Roti shoppe, even the barber shop, these stores bring a 'taste of home' to the mouths and minds of the people who immigrate to Canada for a better life, yet somewhat miss the lifestyle they had.

My parents tied the knot here in Toronto, and their first home was in the heart of Eglinton West before they headed north. Both being new to the country, they were able to settle down in an area where they found helped them 'assimilate', since many others were doing the same thing. So going back to the conversation at work, we realized that most of our parents started off there as there "stomping grounds," and then moved their way out of the busy-ness to raise their children and send them to school.

About 2 years after they had me, we moved to Markham- so I did not get a chance to know what it was like to live in that area, but my aunt happened to move there- so I was able to get a 'taste' of the Eglinton Avenue West culture when we stayed there overnight. It was like going to a new world: I only knew of Markham, and at that time it was still a small town, so when we drove down the Allen Expressway, just looking at the subway trains running alongside the highway on the Spadina line, with all the lights from the apartment buildings always amazed me.

Visiting this ethnic enclave provided me with something that I didn't really have living 'north of the 416' as a youth. It gave me a small glimpse of what West-Indian culture was like outside of my own home- and at that time, the Kiddie's Carnival was held there every summer. That's where I was introduced to the culture of playing Mas...nothing but pure excitement. I'm pretty sure that other visitors and ex-residents of other enclaves throughout the city have a similar experience.

Strange enough, there are some days when, just the mention of the word Eglinton Avenue West causes someone to screw their face a bit because many would classify this area as being too Black, too Caribbean, meanwhile it's the same place that their parents had their first home together. So some of us (sometimes myself, as I got older) shouldn't be too quick to judge an area by its appearance and feel because this ethnic enclave is still a stomping ground and a place that feels like "home" to the people, now OUR age who are new to the country. Some may think these enclaves only separate cultures from one another, but it provides other communities a glimpse of what it's like in the original hometown.

What do you think? Did your family start off in an ethnic enclave? Did you/are you still living in that area?

Want to really boost your confidence? Participate in a FLASHMOB!

2012-01-20T06:25:00.001-05:00

Socacize has a habit of bringing me out of my shell...first it was the instructor training, the guts to actually TEACH a class, the energy to participate non-stop in the two-hour bootcamp class, and now...participating in a FLASHMOB in the middle of downtown Toronto! Am I mad or what?!!!

Myself as well as other instructors and participants braved the cold, snowy weather and ran into the streets promoting something that we absolutely love!

Socacize Flashmob @ Yonge & Dundas

Yes, there were a bunch of us who ran out for "lunch" to get on bad in the middle of Yonge and Dundas. What in the world were we thinking? Well we were there to "SOCACIZE! WUK AND WINE" as my girl Herm yelled out, and to promote the Socacize bootcamp classes that are happening right now, getting ladies and gents into their "beach body" in time for *sigh* Trinidad Carnival. We definitely caught a lot of people by surprise, but we definitely had their attention! Some participated (an elderly man waving the Socacize towel like he was in a fete!) but many had their cameras out to get footage of our "wukup-inanigans."

For those who are interested in participating in the Socacize bootcamp (we have three weeks to go) and are in the Greater Toronto Area, there are three locations available:

1. Scarborough: Thursdays (Jan 5th-Feb 9th) @ 6:30-8:30PM (Armenian Community Centre- 45 Hallcrown Place);

2. Brampton: Saturdays (Jan 14th- Feb 18th) @ 12:30-2:30PM (Kiwanis Youth Centre for Sports Excellence -247 McMurchy Ave S.);

3. Toronto: Sundays (Jan 8th-Feb 12th) @ 2:00-4:00PM (OIP Dance Studio- 190 Richmond Street East)

If you go, you'll see me at the Scarborough location...all up in the front!

So now that the winter flashmob is complete, we'll definitely be planning a larger one sometime in the spring...when it's warmer!!!!

Have any of you participated in a flashmob? Don't be afraid to share your experience!

Video Blog: Bentonite Clay

2012-01-17T06:25:00.006-05:00

Here's another video that I made this weekend: excuse the lighting (for I really need to work on that), but this second video blog is about Bentonite Clay for locks/natural hair. This took me quite a while to edit because I did it in three parts: The intro to Bentonite Clay, what it looks like on my head, and how it worked after I washed it out. Check out the video blog below and let me know your thoughts on it- even suggestions on what other topics I should talk about.

Don't forget to subscribe to my Youtube page as well!! The more, the merrier :-)

Peace and Blessings.

Celebrating 5 Years of Holy-Moly Loc-rimony!

2012-01-16T06:25:00.026-05:00

BEFORE: The summer before I locked my hair

On January 13, 2007, I made the decision to start my lock journey. After many months of deliberation, I plugged my nose and jumped into the pool of natural-ness, not knowing what the outcome would be, but definitely knew that it was a big responsibility.

I was new to the lock game, so I didn't know that beeswax wasn't a good way to start locks, and that Organic Root Stimulator wasn't the only line that catered to people who wanted to maintain their locks after washing.

As I went forward with my lock journey, I learned the notion of patience when it came to lock maturation and growth. I knew that I was going to grow, but I wanted to see a change with the snap of a finger. But I knew I had to go through the "messy transition" in order to see a difference. I wasn't able to style my hair for a while: I had to wear scarves for a couple of months to cover up the growth at the edges, but by the summer time, they were looking awesome!

The beginning: January 2007

I felt a reached a milestone when I was able to pull my locks into one after the first year- I was happy that I could put the scarves away and let my hair loose. I had some locks re-done prior to, but they were growing out nicely as well.

2008

After the 2nd year I was able to play around with it: being able to put in Bantu Knots so that my hair could have some curls. I loved having the idea of walking around with curly and bouncing locks!

2009

And in 2010, that's when I really noticed when my locks were getting longer by the month as they passed my shoulders. It seemed as if I had more hair to deal with every time I washed and twisted it...a lot more work but I'm grateful for progress I have made!

2010

As my locks gained length, I found different ways to care for my hair in terms of the products I use. I became less of the product junkie and more of a smart product user. I started using more natural oils to maintain my locks.

2011

And now it's a new year, I'm excited to see what new things I can discover with these locks of mine. I am constantly reminded by people (especially at work) about the how my locks are growing compared to when I started at that office three years ago (Yikes! three years already? You know what that means *wink*). So after five years, I'm glad how these locks have turned out and I cannot wait to see what they will look like five years down the road, with the right amount of T-L-C, of course!

AFTER! Look at the difference in 2012!!!!!

Hey my lock'd folks!!! What do you think? How long has your dreadlock journey been? What do you do to maintain them?

Creating Your Own Commandments to Stay Focused and Happy

2012-01-13T06:25:00.000-05:00

Everyone experiences those 'down' days where they may feel that they are being stomped on by people who thrive on their negativity and their 'I-will-always-be-and-have-better-than-you" ego which does nothing but discourage people.

There will also be people who say that they don't understand why I am posting all of these 'positive and inspirational' blog entries, when last year I did nothing but 'boo-hoo' about my feelings and what I wasn't doing for myself in 2011 and in previous years. Am I expected to stick to the negative thoughts and notions until the end of time???

Well, a lot of things can change in 365 days. You can learn a lot about yourself in a year's time, and with that time, work towards a particular goal that you have long desired to; so depending on the outcomes of the goal(s), people like me have every right to write something inspirational!

I happened to read a letter I wrote to myself back in 2008 asking myself why 'this and that' was happening and that letter indicated that I was indeed in a really stagnant place. That was a time where I felt like I was stuck in time...not moving at all. As I read this letter on my way home from work and night class, I compared it to what I am doing for myself in the present. There has been such a significant change between then and now that as I reflected, I couldn't do nothing but smile...a BIG smile. Even though I'm not yet where I want to be, I must admit, I have done a lot. *happy dance*

So yes, I can say that right now...I'm in a really happy place! It's been a long time coming, but all I know that it can only get better, and better! For this year, I hit up the calendar store and bought a Gretchen Rubin Happiness Project calendar. And this calendar provides you with 366 (leap year!) days of ways to help you become a more happier and rounded individual. So on one particular day, as I tore the previous day away, the new day asked readers to come up with twelve personal commandments that they consider as principles in order to guide their actions. Gretchen Rubin provided examples of her personal commandments, but I compiled a list of my own personal commandments that I should be living by for this year...it's subject to change with every experience, but it is a good start in order to keep me focused and happy:

1. Do it now!

2. Love yourself!

3. Smile! (stop the screw-face)

4. Don’t hold a grudge! Let things go!

5. Work hard towards your goal!

6. Keep fit! Run, dance, Socacize, eat right!

7. Never settle for less than what you deserve!

8. Be supportive!

9. Be yourself. Everyone else is taken (by Oscar Wilde...one of my favourite quotes)

10. Think positive thoughts!

11. Patience is key! Everything will happen in time!

12. Focus on your well-being! No one else can do it for you

After I wrote these personal commandments I felt good...knowing that why I need to do in order to keep pushing for better things and to be happy is in my face, kind of like a daily checklist, so when I'm feeling a bit of ways, I can just whip out my commandments and say "stop! girl, refer to #10!" I really like the Happiness Project calendar that I have purchased as well as the book that I bought recently. So for those who are looking to keeping their eyes on the prize, you should make a personal commandment list to keep you grounded, focused and ready, because I'm pretty sure you don't want to be affected by those people who are trying to stomp you down because you're doing something for yourself that they aren't, or who THINK they are doing better, when they're really fronting.

So who is down for creating personal commandments? Who would like to share a couple of their goals?

Nubian Junction: Akua and Akil

2012-01-12T06:25:00.003-05:00

Siblings Akua and Akil

The Nubian Junction is back! It’s been a minute but I'm bringing you two interviews in one! I'm grateful to have had the opportunity to ask siblings and Toronto natives Akua & Akil questions about their lock journey. These two can give me jokes for days: I met Akil when I participated in the Applause Institute's Cotillion Ball back in 2001, and I met Akua a year later, when my sister was a Debutante. What can I say about these two? They are two smart, well-traveled and talented individuals who are doing many great and inspiring things in their lives. And yes, I am in love with their locks! They always have awesome lock styles and they take care of them well! So without any further adieu, here's the interview:

1. How long have you been locking your hair what made you decide on making the transition?

8 years in December (2011). I love natural hair. I love locks. Thought it would be a bold decision very true to my character. It wasn't a major transition for me since my hair was already natural and I was surrounded by many who embraced natural looks

2. How about familial influence? Do you find it empowering to have a sibling going through the same "journey"? What are the pros and cons?

My brother and I started locking around the same time but decided to lock our hair, independent of the others decision. Having similar, full hair, we definitely share info about what products work or how to successfully set our locks into styles. I've had cousins with locks for years who always had beautiful styles, so that definitely influenced my understanding of the style to be one of versatility and swag (yes, I said swag).

The "success" of our locks and the confidence we display have definitely influenced others in our family, including our mother, to lock their hair. They love it.

3. Dreadlocks are becoming more and more popular in the society; do you feel that this hairstyle has changed the greater society’s reactions to natural hair as a whole (e.g. greater appreciation)?

I think that the diverse looks of people with locks has definitely (positively) affected society's perception of natural hair. I've had people on various occasions approach me with comments along the line of 'I've seen people with locks but they're not well kept. Yours are so well kept and you make them look so stylish the way you switch it up.' Some have even questioned whether I really have locks, in disbelief that they could appear so appealing. In the past, I think many have only associated locks with Rastafarian culture or lifestyles perceived as rebellious. Hence, there was little appreciation for the natural beauty of the look and the personal confidence required to portray a look outside of accepted norms. Now you have people of different races, classes, and cultures displaying locks with great variation through colour, styles, and sizes. It's fantanbulous.

4. With regards to natural hair, what would you like to see more of in this city? What initiatives do you think should be in place to create a broader awareness of natural hair?

I think Toronto is a pretty cool city when it comes to natural hair. I see a lot of girls rocking their curls, afros, twist, coifs, etc. Guys are bringing back the gumby and cameo. I love seeing people discover their individuality and rock a look that is "true to you." The best way to permit and enable that would be to have shows or seminars that teach people HOW to manage their hair and become familiar with its quality. Many people think that my hair success will be theirs. We do not share the same genes, health, experiences, etc. that influence our hair. Therefore, people need to be familiar with their hair and then apply the tools and tips to create styles that work for them.

5. Who do you recognize as influential icons for natural hair and dreadlocks?

Jill Scott has had some mean looks. Janelle Monae is a bad chick. Solange is a comfortably natural beauty. I also have personal icons among my friends. The ladies around me are just fierce with their styles and set no limits for what can be done with their hair. They constantly influence the way I talk about my hair and embrace it. For example, in my circle, we remind each other that we do not have DREADlocks. Dread, coming from dreadful, is not how I see my hair. I love reminders and support like that among my friends, which consistently serves to block out ingrained, negative language about natural hair and instead fuel positive perception of my curls.

Jill Scott

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Akua and Akil, thank you for giving me the opportunity to interview the both of you on your lock journey, as well as topics pertaining to it. The two of you definitely inspire me to keep going with my own.

Stay tuned for the next Junction!

She did what? Gym Etiquette Pt. 2

2012-01-11T06:25:00.005-05:00

It’s that time of the year again!! The gym is packed with new members, fulfilling their New Year's resolution to be slim, trim and healthy for 2012. I'm glad to see that there are people going to the gym, working out and taking that initiative to build a healthier life. Now, the gyms may be extremely busy now, but for someone who has been frequenting the gym for some time now, knows that this busy-ness won't last too long. The gym is packed for about six weeks, and then it goes back to its pre-New Year’s resolution volume. I've met many newbies and some have stuck it out and have become regulars like myself, and we are all respectful towards each other, the classes we attend, and the equipment that we use.

But one of my pet peeves with some of the newcomers is that they don’t display the same respect that most of us do, like cleaning up after yourself, wearing appropriate clothing for workouts (which means, not wearing your mud-soaked boots on the treadmill), and using the facilitates in a CLEAN and responsible way. I wrote a blog post about gym etiquette a couple of months ago and one of the rules was to clean up after yourself.

Now, on Monday at the gym, I witnessed one woman taking the factor of cleaning up after herself to a whole ‘nother level. While trying to use the rest room, I came across this woman with one foot in the sink, washing her feet. Now, I’m not a person who would call people out on things (which I really should start), I just stood there, flabbergasted, and in disbelief, with a full bladder. The way her foot was in the sink looked like she was ready to climb up in there and take a bird bath. I was clearly disgusted...we use that sink to wash our hands, faces, and for some people, brush their teeth. So I don’t understand how this woman felt the need to wash her frowsy feet in the sink when there are SHOWER STALLS steps away from the restroom (I don't get it!). What irked me was that, as I walked into the rest room, one of the gym’s trainers were leaving, not saying a word to the girl whose leg was cocked up on the sink, leaving the woman to think it was okay to do what she did. As I left the rest room to attend one of my class, I had to let my gym friends know what I saw….now if I were to see that again, I’m going to have to speak to front desk about it, because I definitely do not want to see that again.

"Oh, no she didn't!!!!"

Yes, the gym is open for those members to use freely, but discretion and respect for others who use the facilities has to be utilized in order to maintain a clean and safe environment…you have to treat these places just like you treat your own home: no one should be left cleaning the mess other people left (e.g. not wiping down the equipment, mats, heck- toilets!), and no one should avoid using a sink that has been used inappropriately. So to that lady who feels as if the sink is equivalent foot soak at the nail salon/spa, don’t be surprised if I (actually) call you out the next time you try that foolishness again.

So I should add this to my list of gym etiquette rules! The experience at the gym should be a place where you can let off steam from a hard day’s work, or as an early-morning wake up ritual, and not a place where you’re grossed out by the actions (or inactions) of others.

Do any of you have strange/disgusting gym experiences? Did the culprit continue with their behaviour or was something done about it?

I did it! Here's to the first of many....vlogs!

2012-01-10T06:25:00.010-05:00

This was a long time coming, but here is my first video blog! I know it's a bit wonky (with lighting) but practice makes perfect, right? After being convinced by my cousins Dawnielle and Ereica (who already have video blogs on youtube), I took the plunge and tried it out. It took longer than I had anticipated (edit, repeat, edit, doing it again) but I did it. It's all about living it up in 2012, right? Well I'm no longer letting my fears and inhibitions get to me so I'm jumping all up in it!!!

My first video blog is about Rhassoul Clay...I reviewed two products that I have, one from Kynk and the other is from Henna Sooq. Check out the link below and let me know your thoughts of this first of many video blogs :-)

Fact or Fiction: Deal breakers become more difficult as we age...

2012-01-09T06:25:00.000-05:00

As we entered into the dating game at a young age, many of us would sort out our prospective partners through traits that were either “yay” or “nay,” and some of these things which we call deal breakers varied from being somewhat strange to being outright disrespectful. For example, a girl would not date a guy who hated soca music; whereas a guy would only date girls who had 'TnA' and nothing else. It didn't really matter if the person was very attractive or not; if he/she didn't meet the requirements of what could be considered girlfriend/boyfriend material, then sayonara! Some might make exceptions and be accommodating while others will stick to their guns and search for the next person who suits their preference(s).

As we get older, the deal breakers become more serious as we start thinking of our future in terms of a long-term relationship and/or marriage. We tend to look at the habits and traits of others and ask ourselves if we can handle being with that person or not. While many will make exceptions on identifiers, e.g. things that are no longer seen as an important element such as body shape, height, race and nationality, what we start to take seriously are the plans ahead. As frightening as it may sound, we all have to go through it.

This topic arose in a conversation I had with someone, in which I was asked if I would consider the prospective partner not wanting to have children a deal breaker. Being a mom to some kids that will hopefully not be as crazy as I was back then, is part of my life plan. I love kids, I used to work with a lot of children, so yes, at this age I can consider that as a deal breaker in a relationship. Ask me the same question ten years prior, then the answer would be different, mainly because my priorities were different then. The dilemma for this person is that a relationship has already been established when this topic was brought up...leaving the person up in arms with the decision that has been made. One partner wants kids, the other doesn't. At an age where you require acceptance more often than not, this leaves this individual in quite a tough situation. The reason for not having children is unknown; but to discover this decision at such a crucial time in the relationship can be devastating; you become torn because a) you love being in a relationship with that person, and b) you want kids...but can't have both.

In relationships, we learn to compromise...some discover a potential deal breaker but would rather weigh out the good and bad out of that union before making a rash decision. In a situation where the desire to have children for one partner doesn't match the needs and desires of the other one, the idea to compromise may cause more harm than good, meaning that one may be inundated with bouts of regret if they chose the opposite of what they originally wanted. In my opinion, I feel that if one were to compromise their personal goals/worth/happiness just to be with someone, the relationship may fade over time. The relationship would be out of balance because one had to cancel their future goals to accommodate the other...it can work for some relationships (it might be that the decision may be the better decision), but not with most. So I hope this individual I spoke to in this current dilemma would find the right path in terms of what lies ahead. We've reached an age where it's not so easy just to say "on to the next one!" when stuck with a relationship problem...when you're in deep, it's really hard.

Despite this situation, what I want to tell everyone is to never compromise your happiness or self-worth just to make the other person happy in a relationship. It may be cool in the beginning, because you're accommodating the partner's needs and wants, but then you realize over time that you're missing out on something that could have been the best thing you've ever had.

What do you think? What would you consider a deal breaker in your life in terms of relationships? Do tell!

Want to know what's happening in your city? Try Meetup!

2012-01-08T07:00:00.001-05:00

Meetup.com

A few months ago I happened to find a website called Meetup. I didn't quite understand the whole dynamics of this site so I didn't pay too much attention to it.

Basically, Meetup is "the world's largest network of local groups" and this site "makes it easy for anyone to organize a local group or find one of the thousands already meeting up face-to-face." My first impression of this site was that it was similar to a dating site, like Plenty of Fish or Match, which isn't the case (wasn't trying to go that route anyway). While browsing the site, I found many groups that catered to a vast array of interests, such as Females For friendship (for those looking to expand their social circle and meet other women for friendship), T-Dot Writers (for those who love to write and to network). So eventually, I decided to register and started searching for groups that I would consider joining. I did not realize that this site was running for many years! Where have I been?

In order to find a group in your area, or have a group find you, you can select as many categories that spark your interest...for example, on my profile, I chose things such as Natural Hair, Leadership & Self-Improvement, Women's Fitness, International Travel, Cooking...a whole bunch. The more you choose, the more you are matched with. So just this week I get an email notification about joining the Ebony Toastmasters Meetup group, as well as receiving an email from my BOPSers group at work, in which I joined (and wrote a blog about) and I plan on attending a couple of ETM classes in the near future. After joining the Ebony Toastmasters group on Meetup, I decided to check around for other groups that I may be interested in joining. Lo and behold, I found a Toronto Naturals group! This gives me the opportunity to meet other T.O-based naturalistas and network...this group also has a lot of events coming up so I should start looking into it.

This looks like a great social networking site to meet people who share the same interests, so check it out!

Hope you guys are enjoying the weekend! Even though it's strangely mild outside, I'm taking advantage of it by slipping on my Nikes and taking a jog outdoors!

Want to boost your communication skills? Check out Ebony Toastmasters!

2012-01-06T06:30:00.004-05:00

Michelle Obama making a speech

At my place of employment, I am part of a diversity group called the Black Ontario Public Service Employees Network which is which focuses on making the Ontario Public Service a more diverse and inclusive environment for people of colour. Town Hall meetings are normally held to discuss the various concerns the public service workers face, or highlight any achievements or initiatives with people or organizations within the city and aborad.

In one of their newsletters, they spoke about a non-profit organization called Ebony Toastmasters. What this is, is an organization that helps individuals develop their communication and leadership skills, and their goal is to help people overcome their fear of public speaking.

These classes are specially built for people who are afraid to speak in front of a group (that's me!), and who wants to improve on their body language when talking to a group (that's me as well- good posture and eye contact is key!)

Founded by Rita and Sam Burke and Michelle Hughes, their goal is to help the Ebony Toastmaster member to:

Learn to overcome (their) fears of public speaking.
Gain self-confidence by regularly attending meetings, participating in club roles and preparing speeches.
Build (their) leadership skills by performing executive roles, organizing meetings and learning how to make them work more effectively.
Develop techniques to channel (their) nervous energy when making presentations.
Enhance (their) active listening skills by giving and receiving speech evaluations and feedback.

For the shy person such as myself, I would love to try and take a few courses to boost my confidence in public speaking/communication. This would definitely assist me in terms of being interviewed for a new job: those panel interviews can really test your ability to speak in front of a group of people when under pressure. This can also assist in getting "out of your element" when it comes to trying something new!

Classes are available on Mondays at 7PM at 791 St. Clair Ave. West, in the Skills for Change Building (in Toronto), and you can contact them at (416) 886-1098.

So who's down for attending the Ebony Toastmasters with me to effectively achieve goals in communication and leadership?

What will give you brownie points? Being consistent!

2012-01-05T06:30:00.063-05:00

Maya Angelou, Kobe Bryant, Samuel L. Jackson, Beyoncé, Denzel Washington, Oprah Winfrey, Jay-z, Tyler Perry, Iyanla Vanzant, Lawrence Hill, Berry Gordy Jr., Harry Belafonte, Jean Augustine, Herb Carnegie, Lewis Hamilton, Lincoln Alexander, Magic Johnson, Louis Farrakhan, Michaëlle Jean, Michael Jordan, Michael Lee-Chin, Barack & Michelle Obama, Nelson Mandela, Quincy Jones, Pelé, Serena Williams, Shani Davis, Usain Bolt

What do these members of the Black community have in common? ~~With the exception of Kobe’s trysts with 105 women per month~~, I consider these folks as being part of a successful consistency movement. They have a goal; make a plan and then deliver on a continual basis, leaving those who follow their success mesmerized and inspired. Their consistency with what they are good at is what brought many of these folks to the top, which shows that one has to “keep it 100” in order to achieve the success that they want, and then some.

Whether you are working towards fame or just success with anything significant in your life, we have to realize that, in order to be recognized as a person who deserves to have a more successful lifestyle, one has to be consistent in their work and dedication. The individuals that I have mentioned above didn’t settle for a half-assed performance if their goal was to get to the top.

While consistency is one of the main components in being successful from a business perspective, it also applies to the relationship you have with others.

From a friendship perspective, being consistent means that you support the friends who need a helping hand, who are preparing for a big change in their life or is embarking on a new path, and not running away when an issue or dispute arises. The consistent support of a true friend determines the longevity and durability of the friendship. Keeping in contact is definitely something that a friend should be consistent in if they want to still have them in their lives. Whether it is via the telephone, text message, BBM, Skype, etc., keeping in contact on a consistent basis keeps the friendship going. Sure, you may not see your friends for months on end, but it is always great to check up on a friend to make sure they are okay.

In terms of consistency in a relationship, this trait can be seen as an important aspect in maintaining a healthy union. Both parties need to be consistent in communication, for without that, the relationship will remain stagnant and not move anywhere. For both men and women, keeping your word, and following through with your plans with what you want to do in the relationship is a good form of consistency; it keeps each person engaged, and makes each other excited for what is next. In the beginning of a relationship, couples enjoy each other's company by going out to various places, like a new play that's out; and trying new things, like going to an all-you-can-eat sushi restaurant. It shouldn't stop once one gets "comfortable" in the relationship...it has to continue! Doh stick! (remember that one, soca fete-goers?)

For the 9-5ers like myself, in order to get to the next step, you have to consistently show that you are an outstanding employee from the time you walk into the office (on time!) and leave the office (on time!). When your work performance is consistent on a regular basis, you do what you're supposed to do, you become recognized by others, which is a positive thing! Just say a higher paying job in your department is open- if you have been displaying a great work ethic, the chances of you being considered to fill the position will be significantly higher than those who continuously slack off. No matter how stressful the job can be, or how much you can hate it, consistency in doing great work can and will bring out something positive.

The list goes on- I could speak about consistency in many other areas (like exercise and fitness- be consistent with workouts and eating right and you'll reap the benefits; being consistent with prayer and going to church, being consistent with paying your bills...), but I'm not going to make this a thesis essay. The point of the matter is, if you want success in anything, you have to show that you are capable of doing so by being consistent with your goals, your motives, actions, dedication, the works. Like the photo above, it says that "consistency is better than rare moments of greatness": it's not about putting in things half-assed most of the time, then going H.A.M when you feel like it (or when there's an ultimatum)...it's about doing your best every single time. Go and get your brownie points, people!

What do you think? Do you believe that consistency is one of the key ingredients in achieving success in all aspects of life?

Just Smile, nah? Quit the Screwface as a New Year's Goal!

2012-01-04T06:30:00.123-05:00

Toronto: Screwface Capital

"Why is she staring at me like that? Hey sis, is there something on my face?"

That's one of the questions I constantly ask myself, or someone I know that's around me about why a particular person is giving me the eye. I can say that this city is filled with a bunch of miserable folks! And I'm pretty sure that you Torontonians will not disagree!

Yes, we live in Toronto, also known as the Screwface Capital where we feel the need to intimidate others by playing the staring game, size each other up from top to bottom while twisting our mouth to the side. I'm more so speaking about the brown-skinned folks, for all of us (yes, ALL) tend to feel more comfortable wearing that "what'chu lookin' at?!" look than the "I-just-caught-the-bus-that-was-about-to-drive-away-and-leave-me" perma-smile in a public setting. We walk around in the mall, on the street, and ride the bus; but the minute we pass someone of our own skin tone, we either give them a side-eye or have some wicked-foolish thought in our head, like "why does she have to colour her hair like that?? lookin' like Pepe Le Pew!" or some other negative thought.

While looking on Facebook last night, I saw someone's status update about a recent murder he posted the article on his timeline for his fb friends to read...it turned out to be a family member of his which sent a chill down my spine. A handsome young man who was known to be "talented, athletic and hilarious" lost his life over a coward's use of a gun. Instead of being the better person and letting things go, the shooter wanted to maintain their "screwface" mentality, and their egotistical mindset by bringing their own down. How many times have I been to the mall and see a group of black girls ready to brawl (well, on that bridge between the mall and the train station at Scarborough Town Centre) over something so simple? How many times do I need to hear the news inform us about another young Black male that has been gunned down because of a fight at a night club/house party? It saddens me to hear my own father say that he has to "hang his head in shame" every time he hears about a recent shooting in this city. We have a constant fear that someone we know could be an innocent victim to a crime that started with an accidental brush of the shoulder. Sometimes I tell myself to be cautious of who I look at because I might just catch someone on an off day with my "long face." Because of this screwface mentality, our safety is being compromised, honestly. It seems that we do it to somewhat protect ourselves, but it's doing nothing but throwing each other into harm's way. The ego is a serious thing.

There are times where I get approached by random men out in public who ask, "can I get a smile?" Of course, the first thing that would come to my mind would be that the dude may be trying talk to me, and most of the time, I'm not having it; but when I think about it, there are too many of us brown skinned folk that walk around town with miserable faces, looking for the world to end, and someone to knock out. Despite the constant (however, declining) number of shootings here in Toronto, we need to realize that we've got to do better in terms of being a better person to our neighbour. Our New Year's goal as Torontonians: to get rid of the screwface mentality- instead of sizing up one another, greet and compliment each other (especially us ladies.) It could be that we're missing out on opportunities to meet great individuals who could become lifetime friends; or even awesome and loving partners whom we can share our lives with. So, as one of my goals, not resolutions for 2012, I will take the time out to compliment a stranger on their nice hairstyle, outfit, accessory or whatever for I know it makes such a big difference compared to the regular stares. It really does- ever since I started locking my hair, I would get random compliments by people on the street and it makes me feel nice (blush). So why not do the same to others?? Take one smile and pass it on...that's all we need to do.

And please, stop the blasted fighting!!

What do you think? Do you think we need to do better in terms of complimenting our own? Do you feel doing so would have a greater impact on how the person complimented would treat others afterwards? It could be a domino effect!

Goodbye Foundation, Hello Clean Face!

2012-01-03T06:30:00.041-05:00

My search for the perfect foundation is over; no, I didn't find one, but I decided to cut my makeup usage down to a minimum. I always had to have a full face of makeup on when I'm going to work, but with all the sweating I will be doing in the near future, it would make sense to have a clean face before and after a workout.

The only thing I will allow as a day-to-day regimen is some eyeliner, mascara, lip gloss and a little bit of bronzer. Anything more would have to be reserved for any night time shenanigans that I may partake in. This is how I would normally look on a day-to-day basis, no matter the occasion:

My Everyday Look

I obsessed about finding the perfect foundation partly because I am quite self-conscious about my uneven skin. I tell people that and they don't believe me. Because of my oily skin, I tend to break out a lot, and because I am darker skinned, my post-acne marks are quite visible until they fade months down the road. So my solution to conceal my uneven skin was to use foundation. First I started off using Maybelline, then I jumped ship and joined the Cover FX bandwagon. I then decided that line wasn't for me so I switched to MAC. I found that the MAC foundation didn't work so I tested out NARS and Make up Forever. No matter what primer, blot powder or foundation setting powder I purchased, my oily skin just compromised that fresh look. I couldn't find the perfect foundation shade as well...I ended up having to mix some shades to find the most suitable one for my complexion, but that meant I would have had to purchase two shades which would cost a pretty penny. After many bouts of frustration, I switched to pressed powder.

The MAC pressed powder that I have been using has been okay, and I have no problems with it, but now I feel as if I shouldn't be putting on as much makeup as I used to. When I would go to the gym for a workout, I would remove the makeup prior-to, but I would go straight home afterwards. Now that I'm running during my lunch hour, the idea of having an icky and sweaty face for the latter-half of the work day is none too appealing. So I made the decision to release my self-consciousness, and put the powder to the side, and go out bare-faced...with the exception of mascara and bronzer.

Getting ready for work

What am I wearing here? For the eyeliner, I'm using a Cover Girl Perfect Point Plus Eyeliner in Onyx; for mascara, I'm using the Clinique High Lengths Mascara (which I must say works WONDERS on extremely curly eyelashes); and for the bronzer I'm using MAC's Powder Blush in Format. I'm slowly getting used to the "no powder/foundation" look but I'm hoping that me not using as much makeup as before would help me create and maintain an acne-free visage. I actually got a Clarisonic Mia Sonic Skin Cleansing System for Christmas and that is also helping me out (F.A.- yeah, I got one!) I really like this product because it really removes the dirt and oil that builds up on my face every day. I love this thing that's all I have to say about it. You can actually get one at Sephora, or on the Clarisonic website.

Clarisonic Mia

I wouldn't call this a New Year's resolution; I would just say that this can be another step to looking and feeling healthier...so goodbye foundation (until it's time to party), and hello to the clean-er looking face! So here's to cutting down on my makeup usage.

What about you? Have you cut down on certain regimens?

Start on your New Year's Resolutions EARLY!

2012-01-02T06:30:00.005-05:00

Setting Goals for 2012

Happy New Year everyone!!!!! Hope you guys had yourself a safe and blessed holiday! I counted down and kicked off 2012 with my sister and cousin at Shuffle Party and had myself a great time.

As you can see, my blog name hasn't changed...finding a name that really suits me and this blog is much harder than I thought it would be. I have a bunch of ideas written in my journal; shuffling adjectives from one place to another, trying to find that perfect title that totally defines me. So, unfortunately, I would have to push that deadline to a further date, even though I didn't fulfill my word in having an updated blog title in a particular timeframe, this gives me a chance to think it out carefully.

However, I do have a deadline for something else, and it is something that I can't back out of, partly because I submitted my application form minutes before writing this blog. My focus the past couple of months has definitely been on fitness, my health and well-being, and my plan for 2012 was and is to take it a little further. I started my New Year's resolution a couple of weeks early by running outdoors, but today, I signed up for this:

Sporting Life 10k Run

Yup! I signed up for the Sporting Life 10-Kilometre run that is happening on Sunday May 13, 2012! We will be running from Midtown Toronto to Downtown Toronto through the artery, also known as Yonge Street. I have 132 days to physically prepare myself for this run, which give me no choice but to keep running, snow or shine. I'm a bit nervous about the run, because the only way I got from Yonge and Eglinton to Fort York Boulevard was either by car or by the TTC. However, it is not a half- or full marathon, so training for this particular run should be fun, as well as a stepping stone to these longer runs.

Sporting Life 10k course from 2009

If this run goes well, which I'm sure it will (because I will be training my behind for this), I will sign up for other 10K runs that occur later on in the year. But right now, I'll update you on my progress from now up until the day of the run. So for those who are interested in participating in the Sporting Life 10k, check out the site to register. Early bird registration is $40 until January 15th...and if you register by then, you will receive a $50 Sporting Life gift certificate that is good for anything in the store (with the exception of Canada Goose products). After the 15th of January, prices go up to $45....so for those who are interested in partaking in this run, sign up as soon as possible.

So here's to my first run! I'm a tad nervous, but I am overly excited because I'm finally doing what I have always wanted to do!!!

Have any of you set any fitness goals for yourself for 2012?? What do you plan on doing this year to keep fit?

Winter Warning- One of the things I should have been prepared for....

2011-12-30T06:30:00.003-05:00

Protect ya Neck!

Yesterday I was ready to go for another 5k run during my lunch break...I had my stuff ready: a long-sleeved tee, my jogging gloves, a hoodie, thick socks and my gym pants. My co-worker came up to me and asked if I was up for it, since it was a bit chilly in the morning, and I told her what I brought. She then gave me a look which made me question the things that I thought would be sufficient for the outdoor run...I was then advised that I would need more than just a hoodie and a long sleeved tee to deal with the winter elements. Clearly, that showed me that I am quite not yet prepared for cold-weather jogging.

Did I feel stupid or what? During my break, I ended up running to the Gap to purchase a half-zip sweater as well as a dri-fit shirt (they were on sale, of course) in the hopes that the extra layers would help me during the 40-minute run. To my dismay, we didn't end up running after all, but I am going to attempt to go at it today.

The North Face Neck Gaiter

My coworker suggested that I purchase a running jacket, as well as a neck gaiter (when it becomes windy- oohh the windchill factor), so that I will be able to withstand what Mother Nature in her back pocket. So I did what any person would do to find information on winter running clothes- I looked online to see what is available at particular stores. I checked the Nike Store online (unfortunately its not available to Canadians), Lululemon and The Running Room but I found some great ideas (more so for women) to prepare myself for these brave jogs.

One thing I know for a fact that I should purchase is a running jacket. Not only will this protect me from the cold weather, it will prevent me from getting sick as well. This jacket is about, umm, $175.

Nike Element Shield Max Jacket

The next jacket, I found it on Lululemon, and this one is about $198....it's a lot thicker than the Nike jacket, however it doesn't have a hood, which I prefer

Lululemon Turn Around Jacket

Will let you all know how that search goes, and what I end up with...but I definitely do need a jacket...my sister said that I should just get a thicker hoodie, but I'm thinking of the times when the weather will drop down to minus 10 with a nasty windchill...enough said about that!

2012, I'm ready for you...

2011-12-29T06:30:00.013-05:00

Never have I been so excited to see a year pass more than this one. I wouldn't say that it was a horrible one in its entirety, but it definitely had me on an extreme roller coaster ride from beginning to end.

It's like my mind is on the starting blocks, waiting for the official to pull the trigger so that I can sprint into 2012 in full force, with 2011 catching the trailing dust. I have my vision board, bank transfers, and scissors (for my credit card) ready, and so much more, because I want to make this year a good one...no, I have to make this year a blessed one.

I'm not going to say that 2012 is going to be 'my year,' like I have said in previous years (e.g. Two thousand and mine) partly because I don't know what kind of surprises I will have, or the kind of adversity I may face, but despite all of that, I still want it to be a memorable one; with all that I have discovered and learned about myself and life in general, I'm more than ready to take this new year on. I took some time out to reflect on everything that occurred this year; I have lost some and gained some...and I plan to use these experiences for everything that I plan to do for this year, and the years afterward. I am so glad that I was able to get up and pursue things that I have been putting off for God-knows-how-long, and my goal is to continue with a fearless attitude until I am unable to do so.

A couple of days ago, Madame Noire posted an article about New Year's Resolutions. It is called Relationship Resolutions for 2012: New Year. New Love. New You. Even though this article focussed on ways for a better love life in the New Year, these resolutions can be applied to other aspects in life and can still reap great results in being a better you for the New Year and beyond:

1. Let go- (I posted a blog about being able to get go of things that hold you back. So yes, you have to let go in order to grow!)

2. Be Brave- (Face your fears. Do things that you’ve always been too scared to do and you’ll be surprised the outcome)

3. Think Positive- (The more optimistic you are, the more optimistic you’ll become. Get rid of the negative talk, for negative breeds negative)

4. Be Honest With Yourself – (Be open with your faults and deal with it head on, it’s all about being able to forgive yourself in order to move forward into something better)

5. Shake Things up a Bit- (MadameNoire said to get out more, and try something new- I can agree with that!)

6. Be Realistic- (Don’t purchase a $70,000 vehicle when you know you can only afford a $15,000 one…be realistic with things such as finances for you don’t want to end up in a big hole)

7. Be Happy With Yourself- (Never settle with anything less than you know what you deserve. Need I say more with this?)

I can say that I have started to do these things this year…little by little. But now that I have, I want to be able to do it ten-fold, so I can have ten-fold in return, or better. I have never counted down the days for New Year’s, for I have only done so for vacations, my birthday, the end of exams, summer break, etc. I am THAT excited to start a new year, because I have so many plans that I will not back out of. I even bought Gretchen Rubin’s The Happiness Project calendar (because the Calendar Club store had everything on sale!) so I can have words of inspiration/daily affirmations right at my desk, so when I feel like “I can’t do this,” I’ll have something beside me to get me back on track. I don’t have solid plans on how I would celebrate the new year, but I know for a fact that I will be welcoming it with open arms!

So, 2012, I'm ready for you...I'm going to make it a year of possibilities!

Have you ever been this excited for a new year to start?

Loc Knots!!!

2011-12-28T06:30:00.003-05:00

Yesterday I finally had the time to do a little something different to my hair so I decided to check out Chescaloc's Channel on Youtube. I have curled my locks many times before, using Bantu Knots, curling rods, and more recently, pipe cleaners. I attempted to try these Loc Knots, using my own hair sans elastic bands, and I wanted more defined curls, so I did it one lock at a time.

...took me forever to do it. But as I approached the finish line, it became a lot easier to do. In the video tutorial, Chescaleigh advised viewers that your locks must be damp in order to achieve the curly look. Try doing this with dry hair and it won't go anywhere. So yes, damp hair is key for this look! I had to make sure that the Loc Knots weren't too tight, for they would become a challenge when it is time to sleep (I didn't listen to myself and made them so tight that it took me over an hour to find the best nook in my pillow to rest on). This is what my head looked like after twisted all of my locks:

Before

I haven't done anything to my locks for a while, so it was hard getting used to walking around with a mop-looking head in the mall and grocery store...but I knew the end result was going to look fabulous! I knew it was going to take me too long to loosen them in the morning before I went to work, so I decided to do them now, and I'm quite pleased with the results! I still have a couple of Loc Knots in, because some of the really thick ones are not working in my favour- they are still kind of damp, so I will need to hide them somehow...but here's the end result!

After!

This is the curliest I have seen my locks! I love them! I just hope they can stay like this for a couple of days, just in time for New Year's. I'm feeling kind of tender-headed, so I will have to spray a bit of leave-in conditioner to ease the irritation...but check out Chescaloc's Tutorial on how to get curls like these!!! Let me know what you think!

Interesting Books to Feed the Mind...

2011-12-27T07:00:00.032-05:00

Some of my 2011 reads

It has been a while since I wrote a blog on books...from the last post, my selection of readings have changed quite a bit for my selection have been more on the inspirational/self-help side (with the exception of Kathryn Stockett's The Help- I couldn't put it down!). I have always shied away from these books because I felt that they were only catered to those who suffered from a myriad of issues...clearly I was wrong. The first inspirational/self-help book I read was Iyanla Vanzant's In the Meantime and it opened my mind and heart to things I never realized pertained to me. That book has inspired me to write a post about actually being in my own meantime. After reading those books, I decided to open myself up to more similar books, and found myself reading books like Arielle Ford's The Soulmate Secret, and Eckhart Tolle's The Power of Now.

I haven't been able to read many books lately, but I did happen to purchase quite a bit. So these books that I have bought will be on my 2012 list of reads. Not sure how I will squeeze in some "inspirational reads" since I will be taking two courses for school, and I know that will take up most of my time, and my social life...sigh.

But here is the list of books that I have outstanding:
1. Wes Williams- Stick to Your Vision
2. Iyanla Vanzant- Peace from Broken Pieces
3. Iyanla Vanzant- Don't Give it Away (this is more like a workbook)
4. Gretchen Rubin- The Happiness Project
5. Kristen Schultz Dollard- The Yoga Body Diet (for my 2012 running aspirations)
6. Damon Young & Panama Jackson (a.k.a Very Smart Brothas)- Your Degrees Won't Keep You Up at Night (supporting my fellow bloggers)
7. Norman Vincent Peale- The Power of Positive Thinking
8. Napoleon Hill- Think & Grow Rich (Subscribe to their daily emails- very inspiring and thought provoking)
9. Gail Vaz-Oxlade- Debt Free Forever (my dad got this for me for Christmas- he wants his children to be able to be financially successful!)

Books to read for 2012!

I found this website called Goodreads a while back, which is a social networking site that provides you with great book reviews and suggestions. You can browse for books for days on this site! Folks, you should check this out if you are searching for another great book to read. If you're on this site, look for me! I'm (of course) NubianSoul!

What is your booklist like for 2012? Any suggestions?

To be able to grow...

2011-12-26T07:00:00.044-05:00

Just the other day, I had a Runner's World magazine on my desk to read and pass on to others at work. A coworker of mine (let's call him Rodney) saw the magazine and asked if I had joined the others during the lunch break jog, which I replied and said yes. He then said that he was proud to see me getting out there, because my focus is on wellness, rather than the party life (like I was much of a party animal). Rodney is an older man, so from the many conversations I have had with him, he's been to many places and experienced many things in his life...but the one most important thing Rodney said for me to do is to create a lifestyle in which is healthy and wholesome.

Rodney mentioned that as one finds that new development or hobby in their life, they will notice that some friends that may have been used to them acting or being a particular way may start distancing themselves, simply because they are not comfortable with adapting to that similar lifestyle, even if it is for the better. Rodney said that, though he has lost some friends along he way, he started gaining new friendships on his newer journey which focused on his new goals in life, which were on fitness, a healthier lifestyle and his well-being. He was able to meet many like-minded people with similar goals, and he was able to accomplish more with this new support system and build a meaningful bond with them. He had to accept the fact that his other friends had to be left behind, for they didn't want embrace the change that was made.

Rodney said that he had to learn that in order for him to be able to grow, he had to let go of the things and people that were holding him back from succeeding.

It is pretty refreshing hearing this from a male perspective. It shows that we all do come to a realization in which we have to let go of particular habits and/or individuals that hold us back from searching for our purpose in life and actually pursuing it. Sometimes people just need a break from that complacent medium in order to be able to discover themselves, evolving into someone that generates nothing but attractive and positive energy. Whether one is on the search to find a new job, purchasing a new car/home, finding a new church, establishing a new circle of friends or a entering into a new relationship- if these things or people aren't contributing to one's spiritual and emotional well being, or if all the energy that is being put in is not reciprocated, then the need to pursue other positive outlets would be the best thing.

For Rodney, he realized that he needed to do better with himself by changing to a healthier lifestyle. Some peers didn't accept the change, so they went their separate ways. I've had my share of that over the past couple of years, and I learned that the support from others with the same mindset is one of the greatest contributors to personal growth and well being...if some are not, then it's all about letting go and let God handle it. The ones you've lost, you will gain tenfold during your new positive journey.

Have you had to let go of people and things that held you back from your own personal development? Do you feel that you have accomplished a lot more ever since? Do tell :-)

Holiday Blessings

2011-12-25T00:35:00.000-05:00

Wishing you and yours a wonderful Christmas holiday. This is the time to eat, spend time with family and enjoy!

All the best!

Nubian Souls Locks...

Hey You! Do You!

2011-12-22T06:30:00.011-05:00

2012 is quickly approaching, and I’m pretty sure that many of us already have our New Year’s Resolution list ready to go…we’ll have goals that we will definitely stick to, and others will be touch-and-go. As I mentioned in yesterday’s post, I started running again. It was supposed to be one of my resolutions for 2012 but I gave myself a good head start on that one. Giving yourself a head start on your goals can be quite rewarding because it gives you a chance to have more of a focus on yourself in an unselfish way.

Just this morning, I came across this blog called Focus on Yourself by PravsTalk. It is a short post but says a lot, and it definitely was something that I feel applies to everyone from all walks of life:

Some of us waste our time waiting for people to live up to our expectations.
We are so concerned about what others are doing that we don’t do anything ourselves.

Its not so important what others are up to; compared to what you are doing.
Focus on what you do, your work; Not on others.

Creating a New Year’s resolution is one thing that individuals to do take action on their personal goals. But what many people (I’m sometimes one of them) tend to do is look at what others are doing in their lives and compare it to what is going on with our own. It can be a good thing at times, since the positive goals of others can inspire one to do something similar, enabling one to achieve something higher than they originally thought was possible. Other times, it can bring about envy and jealousy, which enables you to achieve absolutely nothing, despite efforts to do better. Last month, I came across a post on Clutch Magazine called “Jealous Ones do Envy,” and it is about a woman who is angrily jealous of the joyous and happy love lives of her close friends and family. Despite her success and positive qualities, her actions towards this cause forced people to see her as a bitter human being. The author of this article said that she had to start cutting back on talking about her dating life to this particular woman because when she’s happy, she wants to share it with other people who are genuinely happy for her, not the opposite.

From reading this article, I can assume that this jealous individual failed at her own success because she completely lost focus; she focused on what made other people happy and how they were progressing. It looks as if she compared her life to others and chose to be miserable about it, rather than being personally proactive. And in this case, the author of the article felt that there wasn’t any genuine happiness being shown. We can easily say that this girl is nothing but a jealous and envious b**** and should be left alone. However, she could be a person who's bitter because she's not receiving the same kind of love that her friends get, but let's look at her situation this way: it could be that she needs to focus on her personal development and issues FIRST in order to be truly happy with what she has, as well as being genuinely happy for those close to her in her life.

I thought of a few steps to help someone focus on their personal development instead of others:

1. Limit the time you spend on social networking sites:
-> Many of us want to keep up with what's going on with people's lives, and so we tend to continuously log onto Facebook and Twitter throughout the day to see what kind of new positive and negative updates have been posted. Staying away from social networking sites can help you turn your focus what is happening in your own life, and it enables you to give yourself your own undivided attention;

2. Stop checking your emails immediately after waking up in the morning:
-> The only reason you should touch your phone when you wake up is to turn that alarm clock off. Each and every one of us should be able to say "I'm Awake, I'm Alive, I'm Blessed" and focus on how we should take on the day. We shouldn't be rolling over to see if so-and-so replied to your email while we're wiping the crust out out of our eyes;

3. Stick to YOUR vision, not anyone else's:
-> If you have a goal to do "a, b and c" in a particular time frame, focus on that. If a friend or family member happens to be pursuing similar goals, be sure to encourage and support one another to accomplish them, but don't act as if it is a competition to see who completes the task first and best. It is better to be patient and take your time rather than rushing into something just because the other is going at a faster pace.

4. Keep your distance from things and people that breed negativity
-> Just like the case of the jealous and envious woman in the Clutch Magazine article, you would rather want to surround yourself with positive things and people that encourage you to pursue your goals. Focusing on why this individual is acting in such a way not only brings forth negative thoughts and feelings upon yourself, but it takes away you ability to focus on you because you have been engulfed in why this person is feeling a ways about an issue that may not pertain to you at all;

5. Read motivational books and/or articles to keep you on track with your goals
-> The more positive material you read, the more positive things will happen. On my way home from work last night, I saw a quote- I don't remember where I got it but it is quite fitting...it says, "Subtract the negative to make room for more positive." this quote pretty much says it all.

Keeping a focus on yourself as a New Year's resolution shouldn't be seen as selfish. It should be seen as a shift in priorities in order to be a better individual to yourself and others around you. Paying attention to yourself should be one of the best things one can do in order to grow....instead of focusing all of your attention to the newsfeed of others, a newsfeed of your own personal life should deserve your undivided attention. Bitterness, jealousy and envy should never be an option.

Here's to new resolutions in the new year...and KEEPING them!!!!!!

Breaking Ground...an Ode to Black Girls Run!

2011-12-21T06:30:00.001-05:00

have been following Black Girls Run for a while now, determined to jump on the treadmill and run. I always look forward to reading their “Thursday Runavation” post to get the momentum going, reading inspirational quotes such as the following:

“Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.”

-Buddha

But hesitation seemed to always get the best of me. I have been trying to sign up to run some kind of Toronto marathon but I either had an excuse, or an unforeseen circumstance occurred which forced me to stop exercising altogether. Now that I have taken my fitness abilities to a new level, I feel as if I am ready to finally take on the challenge of signing up for a marathon. The first day of winter begins tomorrow, so the thoughts of me running outdoors weren’t too appealing, but Toronto Parks decided to create a 3.9km multi-use trail that I have been itching to try out now that the project has been completed.

On the note of running during the cold wintry months, check out this post written by BGR, titled “Dispel the Myth: Black People Don't Run in the Cold". It was a short post, giving tips on how running ouside beats the "joys" of running on the treadmill, with one tip tellng us that treadmills are dangerous (remember this? nuff said) which can be very true, if you're not paying attention to what you are doing. Well yesterday, I definitely "dispelled the myth" by actually running a 5k with two of my coworkers during my lunch break...

Yeah, I did that! (word to Nova B. Rutherford)

A couple of my coworkers normally run through Rosedale Valley in the downtown core during their lunch break, and felt that they needed to expand their running group by recruiting others into the mix. An email was sent out to the branch, and I said "why not." After a couple of cancellations due to meetings and vacations, I finally hit the concrete and ran the full five. The first half of the run went really well- I kept pace, and was able to hold a good conversation without being out of breath. Now, as we approached the second half, we started running uphill which became challenging...muscles started to hurt, breathing became difficult, but I kept going. I'm glad that I didn't layer up too much because I was burning up by then, in the cold. Then it was the run to to the "finish line," also known as the office, where we stopped to stretch and cool down before we headed back to our desks.

Rosedale Valley

I'm glad I ran yesterday- I've been encouraged to continue running with them, and I will do so...but I would need to start shopping for some running gear that is more suitable for the colder weather...but that discovery will be in another post.

So here's to the many downtown runs I plan to do...and I know I will be more than prepared to run my first marathon (I'm starting small first, though). So, thanks to the posts that I get inspired from on BGR, I'm now breaking ground and running....as a black girl in T.O, in the cold!!!!! I have no excuse not to go out and run now!

A “pinch ah dis” and a “pinch ah dat” is NOT a measurement! A Canadian woman's Caribbean cooking woe...

2011-12-20T10:33:00.000-05:00

Where did December go? Christmas is in 5 days, and as of last night I finished my gift shopping (thank the good Lord), so now it’s time to prepare my belly for the week-long Guyanese Christmas feast!

But with all this preparation, and the fact that I am getting older, I was forced to sit back and start thinking to myself: will I be able to carry on this Guyanese tradition in my own household in the future? There are so many Guyanese and other Caribbean island dishes that I have enjoyed ever since I was a young child, but never really had the chance to hold down the kitchen with my cooking skills.

When you live in a household where the mother is the Queen of the kitchen, it’s becomes difficult to establish your own style and niche for cooking. It’s not like I don’t know how to cook- I do. I cooked and baked (some SERIOUS banana bread and fritters) for myself when I was away at university. But when I returned to Toronto, my attempts to cook became less frequent and I was left to hang up my barely-used wooden spoon.

I have attempted to try to make various Guyanese dishes, but I get confused and frustrated. Why? I’m sure many of you can agree to this, but a “pinch ah dis” and a “pinch ah dat” is NOT a measurement! My “pinch” always ends up being “too much” or “too little” LOL! I’m not saying it’s wrong, but the younger generation is used to using measuring spoons and cups to make their dishes (…or maybe it’s just me). I want to be able to whip up a good iron pot of chow-mein, dahl and rice, pepperpot, and pone with ease so that I can satisfy my cravings instead of running to my house or to the nearest Guyanese bakery.

A couple of months ago, I came across a website called Caribbean Pot. Created by Christopher De La Rosa, he created this site because he disliked the fact that Caribbean cuisine was “not as documented (cookbooks etc) as so many other cultures globally and most people outside the Caribbean are deprived of hundreds of years of cooking traditions.” He also created this site because he wanted his wife and daughters to learn how to make the traditional dishes that he enjoyed in his native country of Trinidad and Tobago, AND since he “learned with the “dash or this and a little of that” method (no real measurements)” he knew he had to not “only document things for them specifically, but provide pictures to aid in the cooking process.” *smile*

Subscribe to CaribbeanPot.com!

I have since subscribed to his website and I have been receiving weekly emails with various recipes that I am dying to try out. Some of these recipes include Garlic Pork (something that both Trinidadians and Guyanese eat for Christmas), Sorrel Drink (remember I put that in my hair for the Henna hair dye? It’s a good drink too!), and Caribbean chicken soup. I am not sure how many recipes Christopher has on this website, but it’s enough to make a book out of it (hint, hint, wink, wink!) So for those (yes, even the non-Caribbean folks) who would love to learn how to cook Caribbean food, this is definitely the best place to start, so I say subscribe to Caribbean Pot and I’m sure you will not be disappointed. The pictures alone will get your mouth watering for a dish.

Anyways, I just wanted to rant a little about this because I’m sitting here at my desk with a piece of Rum Cake that my co-worker brought in. We both don’t make it, but we are eager to know the ins and outs on how to make this awesomely goodness that has, yes, plenty of rum! We’re both in the same boat where our parents are hesitant to give us a chance to make dishes that they have been making for years…I’m pretty sure they would love for us Canadian-born kids to carry on the tradition that their parents have done, they just need to hand over that spoon!

Got Thighs?

2011-12-19T11:49:00.000-05:00

Cowabunga!

See these legs? They have taken me to Sports camps, Track and Field championships, Basketball tournaments, Body Pump classes, and now Socacize…so naturally, I have some thick ~~put you in a UFC headlock~~ thighs and calves. Even though they love rubbing against each other and wreak havoc on some of my jeans, create some kinda heat during the hot summer months, I won’t trade these cows in for anything else. However, let me tell you how frustrating life can get when I'm trying to shop for a good pair of pants or jeans. You would think that clothing companies would be more diverse in terms of sizing so that everyone can find those pants that make their body go POW! I don’t own many pairs of jeans because of that, and because I work in a corporate office, I own a lot of dress pants.

Finding dress pants for my long legs aren’t easy either, but I have found that the Gap has dress pants that fit me quite well. The ones that I feel most comfortable in are the Premium Wide Leg Trousers, as well as the Perfect Trouser Pants for they give a nice professional look…and you can wear them in both a dressy and casual setting. Right now, the Wide Leg Trousers come in three colours and three lengths (ankle, regular, long); the traditional Black for $69.50, Camel for $26.99, and grey for $26.99 (on sale on the Canadian site so get on them). I don’t have the camel colour, so I might just have to go and pick that one up! The Perfect Trouser Pants are selling for $69.50- but the Gap always has a sale on their Premium Pants, so you can purchase them for about $40 every couple of weeks or so.

GAP Wide Leg Trouser Pants

Although I haven’t purchased a pair of jeans from PZI Jeans, they look like they provide the thick-legged woman with the size and look that they want. Let’s not forget about the horrible gap-at-the-waist that many of us have to deal with. I won’t order a pair of jeans online just yet- I would rather go to the store and try them on first, just to be sure they are true to their size. Their jeans look hot nonetheless! The jeans in the picture below are for $80, which is a decent price for a pair of jeans nowadays. I will definitely be on the search for a store that sells PZI jeans when I visit the states again!

PZI Jeans

I actually came across a site where you can purchase custom-made jeans that fit your body type. This site, Indi, provides men and women with the style, wash, trim and length that they prefer. For women, you can choose a slim, relaxed, skinny, or trouser; then select the style by customizing the fabric, leg shape and pockets; and then customize the fit by filling out a profile to get jeans that are made for your body. I tried it out and created a pair of skinny jeans in an athletic fit. In the profile, it is pretty detailed: you need to tell them whether or not your pants gape at the waist, or if it fits too big when the jean fits the hip. For the legs, you have to choose whether they are thin legs or full and firm. I like how we are able to choose these, but it would be more precise if we measured ourselves and provided the numbers to Indi…that way the fit would be more precise (in my opinion). These jeans are a bit pricy- $175 for each customizable pair, so I am quite hesitant to purchase a pair of jeans where I’m kind of “guesstimating.”

Indi Jeans

Have any of you purchased a pair of jeans from the Gap, PZI or Indi? I would love to hear your feedback on this! I need some jeans for these legs of mine!!!

The Effects of Bullying

2011-12-18T22:58:00.000-05:00

Gossiping is bullying too...

Once upon a time, there was a little black girl who excelled in math classes, practised for her piano lessons, loved sports and made many friends when she went to summer day camp. In her neighbourhood she would clown around with her neighbours as well as the visiting cousins and family friends from dusk ‘till dawn, for it was non-stop fun and foolishness until everyone was hollered back into the house by their parents.

Even though this little black girl may have been a bit mischievous at times, she enjoyed what life had for her....

But what she hated was going to school. Why? Because some of her classmates thought her behind, eyes and nose were too big to be in the “cool” group, and that the fly extensions she had in her hair, came from a horse’s tail. Those math classes that she went to were thought of as being something for dummies who had the inability to count from 1-10. When this little girl had braces with colourful bands, she was called “ugly.”

The taunts eventually came to an end when she started receiving compliments about her mathematical skills, her height, her hair and even her round behind by the same individuals who said the opposite not too long before. Even though this now-older girl somewhat appreciated the compliments, it did not take away the embarrassment that she experienced in her younger years. The people who made fun of her may have forgotten about what they said, but this girl, the victim, will never forget.

There are scenarios much worse than what I have mentioned; and even though the people doing the bullying/gossiping may think that this is something just to make the day go faster, or just to show people that they are “cool,” the psychological effects that the bullied individual will feel will not last as long as the “laughing session.” These feelings could last years after and can have a negative effect on the way they live their lives.

...I wanted to write something about the effects of bulling: I have been reading a lot of articles lately about youths committing suicide because they could no longer tolerate the hurt and pain others caused them to go through. One article in particular: I found an article on the Globe and Mail about Facebook launching a suicide prevention tool to help youth that are considering suicide because of bullying. This is quite a sensitive issue, and I feel that more attention should be directed to ways to fight bullying in schools, due to the alarming rate of suicide caused by this. Some youths may feel as if they have no where to go for support and encouragement, and that ending one’s own life would put an end to everything that they are dealing with.

According to Bullying Canada, they state that "approximately one in 10 children have bullied others and as many as 25% of children in grades four to six have been bullied." There are four identifiable types of bullying that occur, and they are verbal bullying (spreading rumours, making negative references, unwanted sexual comments), social bullying (excluding others from a group, humiliation), physical bullying (hitting, shoving, destroying or stealing belongings), and cyber bullying (using the internet or text messaging to intimidate). Bullying Canada describes the effects of bullying as something that can have long-term physical and psychological consequences, and some of these include:

Withdrawal from family and school activities;
Wanting to be left alone;
Shyness;
Panic attacks;
Not being able to sleep;
Sleeping too much; and
Nightmares

Furthermore, Bullying Canada explains that bullying can have an effect on learning, and that "stress and anxiety caused by bullying and harassment can make it more difficult for kids to learn. It can cause difficulty in concentration and decrease their ability to focus, which affects their ability to remember things they have learned." Not only is bullying "painful and humiliating," the kids who are being bullied feel "embarrassed, battered and shamed." Like I have mentioned before, if the bullying does not come to an end, it can lead to "consideration of suicide or violent behaviour."

This video below became viral a couple of months ago...this is a five-minute clip which describes the experience this youth had to face in his grade school years, and that he considered suicide multiple times, but realized that they are "millions" of more reasons to live. I found it quite touching, so if you haven't done so already, check it out:

Despite the efforts many schools, government and organizations are doing in order to stop and prevent bullying in the school systems, they need to do more...technology is always changing. You can't necessarily tell a youth to change their cell phone number or deactivate their Facebook profiles to get away from the bullies, because many bullies will find other ways to hurt someone, even though they need help themselves. Also, the teachers in the school systems should be more watchful of what is going on...we are forever grateful for your hard work and dedication that each of you have for your students and I'm sure each and every one of you strive to have well-rounded individuals as learners.

There is so much I can say about bullying, but the main thing is to keep finding ways to put an end to it so that youth do not consider suicide or other extreme acts just to alleviate their pain.

If you hadn’t noticed, that little girl I mentioned was me. I never considered ending my life because of it, but back then, I was truly hurt by many comments and jokes. And when I hear stories about bullying, I take it quite seriously because I know exactly how it feels to be ridiculed for looking and being somewhat “different” from the rest of the students...

Bullying is NO joke people.

Yikes! 11 days to go!

2011-12-14T22:11:00.001-05:00

Nati Necklace

...So I'm kind of struggling to write detailed blog posts this week because I am simply exhausted from all the studying and running around, but for now I will keep them short and simple for the time being...

I'm one of those last minute shoppers who makes most of her runs between the 20th and the 24th during her break. By then, most people who work downtown are already on their vacation, so things are nice and quiet, and I don't have to deal with the madness at the malls. Next year, I just might do all of my Christmas shopping online because I simply cannot stand in lines that last more than 15 minutes for it is not my cup of David's Tea.

It would have been logical for me to complete all of my Christmas shopping via online, since I'm always buying something from T-shirts to jewellery. I'm always on the lookout for something unique and original, so I visit Etsy or Bigcartel to check out what neat things I could purchase. Since I'm (~~kind of~~) in the holiday mood, and since many of you are still shopping for last-minute gifts, I'll show you some sites that I check out on a regular basis (jewellery and accessories), and hopefully it can give you some ideas on what to get your homegirl/sisterfriend/bredrin/loved one:

Peace Images Na Poi Bracelets

So for one, I'm always checking out PeaceImages for something new. These are handmade jewellery pieces made by Camille and I don't even know how many pieces I have from her, but I can definitely say that she is one of my favourites when it comes to getting unique jewellery. She's now based in the ATL, but you'd never have to wait too long to get a package from her in the mail. The Na Poi bracelets are customizable, so you can choose the colours you want (blue, purple, amber, black, peach, deep red), and the charms as well. I'm always excited when I get an email from her notifying followers about her new creations.

AfroDisiac's Queen Wooden Earrings

Next up, we have AfroDisiacs. I discovered this Canadian shoppe while attending the Afrobella event back in September. I met a girl that night who was wearing similar earrings and I HAD to know where she got them from because they looked so nice. She has various earrings right now, ranging from a "Pick Yo' Afro" style, an "Out of Africa" style, and one that says "Natural"...definitely a store that you should check out. She also has awesome looking artwork if you are looking to give your humble home an Afrocentric twist.

Afrodelik's Jelgobe Fulani T-shirt

Here's another Canadian shoppe that I fell in love with the first time I saw it. Its called Afrodelik, created by an artist by the name of Desiree Marshall and her site specializes in T-shirts with various types of hand-drawn Afrocentric art. Her shirts have been worn by celebrities such as Sherri Sheppard from The View, Jully Black, Alicia Keys, Amerie, ~~sexy ass~~ Derek Luke and Jill Scott. Of course, I had to purchase the Jelgobe Fulani t-shirt and I cannot wait for her to come up with some new ideas. Oh yes, be sure to check out her site for she has a sale going on: 20% off all Afrodelik T-shirts!

Priss The Shop: Long African Chic Oversized Clutch

This is a bag that I definitely had to pick up. I bought this bag from another Etsy shoppe called Priss the Shop, and the creator specializes in handmade clutches and African-print ear buttons. This is definitely for someone who wants to brighten up their closet with colourful handbags. I actually bought this bag and another bag from this shoppe, and everywhere I go, I get a lot a compliments about it. Love it.

I Am Her Apparel: Dark Chocolate T-Shirt

Last but not least, we have a site that just launched called I Am Her Apparel. They are a collection that has been "inspired by the documentary film, The Souls of Black Girls, that offers uniquely designed apparel to provide women of color with a sense of confidence and empowerment." The t-shirts come in different "flavours," which includes Mocha, Butter Pecan, Dark Chocolate (that's me!), Dulce, and Milk Chocolate. Right now they have a Christmas promo: if you buy two or more I Am Her t-shirts, you will receive a complimentary gift from Carol's Daughter's new Chocolat collection! So check it out!

There you have it. A list of some of my favourite things which can hopefully give you some ideas on a Christmas gift, or just something for yourself. Also, I came across this article on Huffington Post titled "35 Black-Owned Etsy Stores for Black Friday" which gives a list of stores that you can check out. Peace Images is among the list of shops, but I do have my eye on some other stores. The shopping continues.

What do you think? What are your favourite stores to shop online from to get accessories?

New Year, New Name?

2011-12-13T06:30:00.002-05:00

I am thinking of changing the name of my blog. I’ve been sitting with this idea for quite some time but I am not sure what I want to change it to.

To be honest, I don’t know where I got the name NubianSoul from, really. It was just one of those things that sounded good at the time. A black woman with soul, and with locks. I felt that the name suited me as an individual, so I stuck to it. But now, I feel like I have grown out of that name, and it’s time for me to evolve into something new.

Even though this blog was initially created to document the progress I was making with my lock journey, it turned into something different- I went in a different direction in terms of the blogging content. This past year I have posted entries on things ranging from being self-confident, to the colour of my skin. I still write posts about my locks, but not as often as I would like, and I have less time playing around with my hair. I felt that I had to say something more than just my lock journey. Having said that, I want to have a name that reflects the changes that I have made over the past year and the new opportunities ahead…

My goal is to find a name just in time to ring in the new year. But that's just around the corner, so I have quite a bit of thinking to do. Just like my personal apology letter, I just want to be able to start something on a fresher, more fast forward pace. I want to find a name that really reflects me as a woman on the path to clarity.

I'm open to ideas :-) so don't be afraid to shoot suggest something but I know this name has to truly reflect me, my ideas, my lock and personal journey...

Think its time to push the name NubianSoulsLocks over to the sidelines and bring forth something more meaningful.

What do you think? Should the name stay or go? Do you like the idea of a new change for 2012?

Head Frustrations!

2011-12-12T10:50:00.000-05:00

I have one of those hair days. Those days when you want to style your hair in a particular way; you checked out the youtube tutorial, did an adhoc version before the 'masterpiece,' only to realize that the pins won't stay put, some locks just won't stop sticking out, and it just simply falls apart?

You get so frustrated that you leave the house looking like you've been in a UFC fight? That's what I'm experiencing right now...

One of those days where I feel as if my locks need a pair of these...

Because they are acting SO unruly! They don't want to stay put, they are acting like children in a summer day camp! just no behaviour!

It comes at the worst time! I have an appointment at Magenta Photo Studio tonight- I wanted to do a lil' something so I booked the appointment for my birthday, but because the necklace I wanted to wear for it took so long to be mailed to my home, I had to move it today. I hope it turns out well tonight! If it does, I'll be more than happy to show the pictures off to you...if it doesn’t, then it will be well hidden somewhere in the baseboards in my bedroom.

Speaking of UFC fighting, a Toronto City Councillor is suggesting that schools adopt a program backed by the notorious club...this came to light when a program that teaches Brazilian jiu-jitsu to at-risk youth involved in "sex work, pimping, gangs, drugs or street life." Not sure if I'm down for that- it will definitely help with bullying, but the kids doing the bullying would want in on the fighting too...so that doesn't look like a good idea at all.

For more information on this article, check out The Star.

That's all I have for now today- and why am I still picking out random hairpins out of my head? This is my short random rant.

Tell me about your hair battles...do you have one of those days where your head is just NOT having it? You just want to grab some scissors to teach it a lesson?

Anyway, Happy Monday Everyone!

More Babies??!! Girl, aren't you tired?

2011-12-10T08:30:00.028-05:00

The Duggar Family

I just heard that Michelle Duggar, the mother who has gained fame and fortune in TLC’s show 19 Kids and Counting, just suffered a miscarriage after making the announcement that she and her husband Jim Bob were expecting their twentieth child.

*covers eyes* Are you serious?! It would have been 20 Kids and Counting? When will they retire?

I kind of had to jump out my seat for a bit when I learned that Mr. and Mrs. Duggard were expanding their army of children. Having this many children a century ago wasn’t uncommon since they provided a great help to the household and it was also a great business incentive- the more children you have, the more help you can get to build the business. But to have twenty children in 2011, many families are struggling to raise just one child! Look at the economy these days…with the high unemployment rate, rising costs of food and housing (mortgage rates are getting worse), costs of transportation shooting out of the roof, individuals are struggling to provide for themselves, let alone a child.

While it is very obvious that the Duggar family can more than afford to have another child because of the money they are now making from the television show, and their children’s educational future are more than secure, the majority of us aren’t being sponsored by big television corporations. So, money doesn’t come easy! I checked out an article on Canadian Finance Blog titled “How much Does Raising a Child Cost?" which gives you a breakdown on the average cost of a child from infancy to 18 years of age. They have produced a chart which categorizes the costs of things such as food, clothing, health care, transportation, recreation, and shelter:

From Canadian Finance Blog

Mind you, this chart does not include the cost of post-secondary education, which would have put a big dent in the total cost (especially if the child decides to leave the home to pursue higher education, like I did). So if you look at the bottom right hand corner of the chart, you will see that the average cost of raising a child is a whopping $182,190.00.

Now…if you look at the Duggar family and try to estimate how much they could be paying to raise their children (if TLC weren't in the picture), multiply that number by twenty.

The amount is *drumroll* .........

$3,643,800.00

Whew! That is a LOT of money! And what if all nineteen children went to pursue post-secondary education? I know it's not cheap to go to school in the United States, so I can only imagine the costs for that! Looking at the costs immediately has me thinking about any thoughts of having children of my own. It doesn’t discourage me from wanting to have any, but it makes me think of ways to start thinking of saving money so that my future pickneys can attend extra-curricular activities such as swimming lessons, Afro-Caribbean dance and basketball...even taking them to see the world, and enjoy that island life. I’m sure this won’t happen any time soon, but its always great to have a head start, right? Sigh! Just don’t expect me to be bearing more than two or threeUnfortunately, the cost of living and raising children will just increase year by year, so I can only imagine how things would be a couple ofyears down the road.

I really don’t know how Mrs. Duggard does it…being pregnant every year of her married life. I'm sorry to hear about the miscarriage, but that should be a sign that she needs to give herself a break, plus I heard that she's at risk since she is 45 years of age.

Me? I would very much love to give my womb a break...I cannot fathom having a big belly 75% of every year. No thanks.

What are your thoughts? What do you think think of the cost of raising children in this day and age?

Forgiving Yourself...

2011-12-09T06:30:00.000-05:00

I am an avid fan of Iyanla Vanzant and I read her books every chance that I get. Since I haven’t had the time to read her books now because of school, I check out the daily emails that I get that come from her “Daily Stimu Mail.” Each daily email contains excerpts from her many inspirational books which gives a chance for subscribers to get a feel of what she has to offer from each book, as well as put some of her words to action. On Monday, I received one of her emails, and it was titled I AM DEVOTED TO SELF-FORGIVENESS

I know I said that I will stop posting “feeling sorry for myself” posts, but this one, I feel, will put a complete end to it.

Why? What happened between the miserable birthday post and now? Well, check it out...this Daily Stimu Mail email started off with a quote, saying this: “I will know peace when …I learn to forgive myself.” After reading this first line, it felt as if I had one of the biggest "a-ha!" moments I have ever had. It was that morning where I came to realize that I need to forgive myself from all of the setbacks, letdowns and disappointments that have occurred in my. Over the past couple of months, I have been trying to "live it up" by doing things that I have always wanted to do, but, I wasn't really "at peace." So, it was my fault for not being able to reap the benefits of my own achievements.

I have copied and pasted the message from the email that I received;

It can be challenging to forgive someone. The hardest person to forgive may be you. Considering what you know about yourself and what you are capable of, there are times when you cannot forgive things you have done. At times, it is hard to believe that you can forgive yourself; that you deserve to be forgiven or, that you are worthy of forgiveness. For some reason, you mistakenly believe that to forgive means to allow or to say it is okay. Most of us will never allow ourselves to get away with anything without being punished. It is cruel and unnecessary to punish yourself for being human. As human beings, our growth, learning and healing are always at stake. Forgiveness fosters all three. Each of your actions is motivated either by something you are ready to receive or something you are ready to release. Detrimental or dishonorable actions usually mean that you are ready to release something. Some false, limiting or unloving belief. Some unreasonable fear. Your actions will demonstrate how and why the belief no longer serves you. Your actions will demonstrate where you need to grow; what you are ready to learn or; what you are ready to heal. When you forgive yourself for believing you deserve to be punished, growth occurs, learning takes place and healing is the result. Punishment rarely fosters learning. In fact, it is the precursor to control. When you forgive yourself you release fear, eliminating the possibility that fear will continue to control your behavior. Until today, you may have found that it was very difficult to forgive yourself for certain behaviors you have engaged in or certain actions you have taken. Just for today, be willing to grow, learn and heal yourself. Prepare yourself to release the fear that controls your mind. Forgive yourself.
Today, I am devoted to creating a divine growing, learning and healing opportunity with self-forgiveness!
From Until Today! by Iyanla Vanzant

Pretty powerful, huh?

Another thing that I did this week was attend a webinar featuring But I Love Me More's Nova B. Rutherford titled "Three Steps to Loving you More." It was a half-hour seminar which focused on ways in which someone can work towards positivity in order to have the lift that they want. This was an AMAZING webinar that was beneficial for both men and women, and I suggest you subscribe (follow her on twitter and facebook) to her site so you can read some of the material she has posted, as well as attend a webinar. There were three steps mentioned. The first step, ACCEPTANCE (e.g. accepting yourself for all that you are); the second step, ACCOUNTABILITY (being accountable for yourself for the things you need in order to have the life that you want), and finally ACTION (working towards a goal and being persistent with it). Now, how does Nova B. Rutherford's webinar tie into Iyanla Vanzant's message from her book Until Today!?

Well, it's like this: In order to accept who you are, be accountable for your motives, and take action on your goals, you have to first forgive yourself from all the unnecessary angst that you put yourself through. Whether it's letting life pass you by, not being able to say "no!", being stuck in a miserable job, being unhappy with a friendship or relationship...it doesn't even have to be something extreme, but, you have to learn how to APOLOGIZE to yourself for all you have put yourself through, knowing very well things could have been better/different, and FORGIVE yourself in order to be able to successfully follow through with the three steps of loving yourself more.

Of course, like everything else, this revelation will not occur in the express line- it's going to take time, but this realization has definitely brought me to a new level of finding happiness. This "a-ha!" moment has me more than excited!

There are probably many ways in which individuals can forgive themselves: they could stand in front of the mirror and say "Hey! YOU are forgiven!," or just say it in their head. My choice of action: I'm going to write a letter to myself...I don't know how long, but I will let out all of the anger on a piece of paper, call myself out, and ask for forgiveness. I'm not quite sure what I will do with that letter afterwards, but I know once that letter is complete, I will feel different. As the picture says below (yes, I had to write this backwards for the picture), this "a-hah" moment is definitely a work in progress.

And then...I will know peace :-)

Let the work begin!

Nerd!

I Juss Want to Whine....

2011-12-07T08:06:00.031-05:00

I'm back! Exam done, class done. Time to finally relax for a couple of weeks!

-------------------------

I have been going to New York City since I was a newborn...every Easter and Labour Day long weekend, my parents would pack us up and make the 10 hour drive to Queens and Brooklyn. Its strange to say, that as a person of "West Indian" descent (my parents a Guyanese, so we are, geographically, South American), I have never attended the West Indian American Day Parade on the Parkway. When I'm there- either at a Guyanese BBQ in Brooklyn or just on Jamaica Ave, I see cars that are decorated flags, rags, mini-boxing gloves reppin' where they are from...only in New York is where you'll see someone wrap their flag around the hood of their car! That's West Indian love for you!

Now, even though I have yet to attend the West Indian American Day Parade in NY, I have been going to Toronto's Caribana (~~still not calling it its new name~~) since the beginning of time. I have been playing mas over the past six years and I don't think I'm quite ready to end that trend quite yet. For the duration of the Caribana Parade, the Toronto Police Service is out there on Lakeshore Boulevard to make sure things go as smoothly as possible. As a masquerader, I witness many police officers enjoying the parade, complimenting masqueraders on their colourful costumes and even taking a lil' wine:

Okay- so this picture looks a bit outdated, but it still happens! They have fun!

But according to the New York Times, many NYPD officers definitely don't feel the same way. A couple of Facebook Pages were found in which disgusting comments were posted about their feelings of the NY Parade. The first line of the article was as follows:

They called people “animals” and “savages.” One comment said, “Drop a bomb and wipe them all out.”

These comments were posted on a Facebook page shortly after the parade in September in light of some “episodes of violence” that had occurred as well as, unfortunately, some shooting deaths. As the Facebook fan page membership grew, so did the rawness and intensity of the comments toward the West Indian and African American Neighbourhoods. For an individual who is hired to serve and protect his city, in this day and age, identify another race as “filth,” it brings an unnerving feeling to my soul. This somewhat shows the cops true feelings towards an ethnic group they feel should be, according to the New York Times, bombed and wiped out.

This is all on Facebook- where the public can easily have access to people’s comments…and as a public servant, they are definitely violating their role to “serve and protect.”

Are these the kind of people we have patrolling the streets? How is anyone of colour supposed to feel completely safe and reassured by the police force when many of them look at us as if we're scum of the earth? Their attitudes towards West Indians and African Americans make you kind of think of why these riots and shootings continue to happen...just saying. One sergeant, during a court hearing indicated that “police officers were forced each year to become victims of the violence of the West Indian Day parade.” Did he say that he’s a victim of the parade just because of its high volume and palancin’ folks? Or is he saying this because he, and his other colleagues don’t want to be contaminated by the “filth” of the brown-skinned revellers?

I'm sure there are many, many NYPD cops out there that enjoy the West Indian Day Parade as much as next soca head, but these rotten apples on facebook are just burining my nose like boiled vinegar.

It’s one thing to have reservations about a particular culture, but to post racist epithets on a page that represents a large public organization is outrageous. I can agree, that as a reveller, we need to do better in terms of conducting ourselves at the West Indian Day parade as well as Caribana…this is supposed to be a celebration of our culture and not a clash of egos that can’t handle a simple disagreement. However, I do not agree with the behaviour of the NYPD officers who feel our existence is nothing but a burden because of it.

We need more unity so people like some of these police officers with no backbone can stop making such comments about us. All ah juss want to do is wine and have a good time.

What are your thoughts on the article that is posted on the New York Times Magazine?

It's That Time Again...

2011-11-30T07:30:00.000-05:00

Paper. Study. Final Exam. One week....ugh.

I've really ben on the ball with the blog entries lately- but I have to get into final exam mode and start studying my behind off, which means that you won't hear from me for a couple of days.

But, I shall return!!

Oh....and please, WISH ME LUCK!

Thanks!!!!!

Want to Review a New Product? Try ChickAdvisor!

2011-11-29T07:30:00.001-05:00

Chick Advisor Product Review Club

Hey ladies! If you haven't subscribed to ChickAdvisor yet, I suggest you start now. Sign up, set up your user profile, and you're good to go!

This is a site where you get a chance to see the reviews, comment, as well as write reviews on many products that you might use on a daily basis. These product reviews range from body lotions, toothpaste, scented candles, food to feminine products.

Another cool thing about ChickAdvisor is that you can apply to be a member of their Product Review Club in which you can actually try out a new product, then review it on their site. What you need to do first is post five reviews and you can apply to be considered for product reviews for brands that work with ChickAdvisor.

After you become a member of the club, they then send out an email about a new product they would like the club to test and you would have to fill out a survey, and then they will determine if the new product is suitable for you to try (e.g. they have brand new diapers- they would like to test it with new moms, and not a person who just owns a pet fish).

I have been testing products for quite some time now, and I had the chance to try out amazing products such as Crest Whitestrips (Advanced Seal), Febreeze NOTICEables Dual Scented Pluggable Air Fresheners, Aquafina Plus+ Water, and one of my favourites, Breyer’s Double Churn Icecream (I had a chance to try out three flavours and wrote a post about it as well: check it out!). With the exception of the ice cream (I was given vouchers to pick them up at the grocery store), all of these products were mailed to my home.

This time around, I have the chance to try out the new Oral-B Pulsonic Power Toothbrush- I’m waiting for it to come in the mail. I love getting these things because you can give feedback to the other participants as well as ChickAdvisor about your likes and dislikes on that product. The best thing about being part of the Product Review Club is that these products are capital F R E E; participating with ChickAdvisor is like having a focus group in the comfort of your own home. If you don’t want to miss out on the next amazing opportunity, I suggest you sign up for them now, review products and join the club!

Will definitely let you know how this new toothbrush turns out when I try it!

Do you sign up for any focus groups or online reviews?

What is Your Definition of a Real Black Woman?

2011-11-28T07:30:00.000-05:00

Artwork from ilovemyhair.com

On Thursday I went to a conference with a friend, and it was about ways in which the black community can move away from poverty and crime. It was a very interesting and informing presentation, especially for the youths who attended, for they were reminded that they must do and act better in order to see an improvement in our community in the years to come.

Before the conference started, there was a meet-and-greet-and-eat session where we had a chance to network with others that were there...I was then approached by an older man who complimented me on my locks and said that someone like me should start up a conference to raise awareness of natural hair.

I smiled at that idea because I did write about in a previous post when Afrobella came to Toronto for the SoulAfrodisiac meet and greet event. I do agree that we should have some more seminars on natural hair how-to's so that people can enjoy their natural hair experience.

The conversation went well until he said that he considers me as a REAL Black woman compared to many others in the room, where many had relaxed hair or braid/twist extensions in the hair, and that people are fooled by their authenticity because everything many of "these women" wear originate from China (e.g. nails, weaves, eyelashes)...then he turned to my friend saying that I need to teach her a thing or two about the naturality, and that I should show her where to find products that would support her natural state instead of her purchasing items that do not support the black community.

That's where I felt somewhat uncomfortable, and before he was able to continue with this conversation, he was called to another table, which left me and my friend confused as to where he was really going to go with the notion of the real black woman. This brought us to the question about what factors constitutes black woman as being REAL and AUTHENTIC...do you have to be natural in order to be real? Do you have to experience the "Big Chop" in order to be put into that category of "realness"?

I believe, you don't have to have natural hair in order to be a REAL woman. Many of my girlfriends have relaxed hair, and that doesn't make them any different from someone like myself with natural hair. We share the same values, goals and aspirations, and we're all as real as they come! Just because someone feels as if they feel better with a different texture of hair doesn't mean that she should be put out of that circle. So I wonder what this man thought of women a few years back, when many of us weren't making the leap to naturality? That we're all fake women trying to fit in with the national majority?

Maybe I'm over-generalizing what the man is trying to tell me, but who knows what this man could have told me if he had the time to speak further about his thesis. Being a REAL black woman is more than just qualities at face value. Being a REAL black woman is having the ability to love yourself, knowing your self-worth, having the ability to achieve goals despite others' doubts, proudly stepping away from the stereotypes that damage the self. Being REAL is about having the drive to be happy, smart, beautiful. A REAL black woman has natural or straight hair, and if they are comfortable with either, there isn't anything much left to be said...so sir, your thesis? I'm throwing it out the window!

Readers, What is Your Definition of a Real Black Woman?

Plank-ed!

2011-11-25T07:30:00.021-05:00

Even though I am a Socacize instructor and I have my own class, I still go to other Socacize classes as a participant, and this past Tuesday was one of the days in which I got my @ss handed to me.

The class had to work extra hard that day because some of the ladies in the class decided to surprise (!!!!) me with a birthday cake with loads of yummy icing! Wasn’t expecting that but it definitely made my week, despite my foul birthday mood. Of course, the instructor said that we had to have more focus on the abs in this class so that all of the icing would all go to the trouble spots.

The class went great, up until the end in the abs segment where we had to plank for a certain amount of time…as a Socacize instructor, I’m supposed to be able to master this routine with ease and grace, right?

Michelle and her side-eye!

The look on the Michelle Obama's face says it all. I struggle to hold myself up for more than a minute because I have horrible core strength, and due to an injury in the summer which caused the joints in the lower part of my spine to be inflamed, it can get quite painful. With the help of a few sessions at the Chiropractic clinic, I am able to withstand the yells from the instructor for a bit longer- but it is definitely not at the level that I should be at. My goal is to inspire the individuals who come to my class to be fit, but I need to work on my “loose belly” and inspire myself to get into better shape.

The person who REALLY inspires me to get rid of my loose belly: my sister.

@stay_RICH

.....Do you see this madness? Like my homegirl Bee says, her body is of the "frickin' chain of all chains!" Holy Moly!!!!

For the past year, she has been on a serious health and fitness tip. She recently competed in a fitness competition (the Jamor Fitness Competition, to be exact) which had many competitors from all over Ontario for the top spot. She trained hard by having a personal trainer, working out on her own, going to cross fit (which I may be brave enough to try one day!) and having a strict diet. Hard work has definitely paid off.

Check out 'dem guns! POW!

Now, I know I would have to work just as hard as she did in order to get abs like her, but I know I would need to take small steps first in order to achieve something big! My sister told me to check out a site called Body Rock TV where workout the craziest routines are posted via video. Most videos are of a lady named Zuzana (who has some very envious abs) showing viewers how to execute many difficult routines that focus mainly on core strength. I have been hooked ever since. Unfortunately, many of us won't be able to enjoy any further videos of Zuzana for she left Body Rock in order to pursue other things. But that doesn't mean that we cannot try out (or just sit back and watch) the many videos posted on this site. Below are some pictures of the plank workout that focus on abs, and with patience, diligence, stamina and a prayer(!), I will have those crazy-sexy-cool-washer-board-abs-like-my-sister-and-zuzana in time *smile*

Body Rock Reptile Plank #1

Check out the Reptile Plank. With this move, you are alternating from one leg to another. The way Zuzana's leg is positioned, she is working on the abdominal as well as the oblique muscles...feel the burn?

Body Rock Reptile Plank #2

What about this one? This definitely requires you to balance, but that's what the core is for...the stronger the muscle, the easier it would be to hold the position (and a good pair of shoes that doesn't make you sliiiiiiide all over the floor):

Body Rock Supergirl Plank

Last but not least, there is this type of plank where you have to be a bit careful with. It is a very effective plank exercise, but if you do not have the right posture, you can seriously hurt yourself (e.g. dislocating your shoulder)...but look at at her abs though!!! On point!

Body Rock Santana Plank

In conclusion: I have no excuse what so ever. In order for me to inspire those, I have to get to work. And I cannot stop until I see and feel a change! No doubt about that! It's going to be a bit tricky, but when I look at my sister, she acts as a daily reminder that, yeah, no pain....no gain.

Sis @ Jamor Fitness Competition

*heigh-ho, heigh-ho, it's off to work I go!!*

What kind of exercises do you use to gain core strength? Would love to hear your thoughts on this!

Happy Friday!!!

Natural Hair in a Workplace Setting

2011-11-24T07:30:00.017-05:00

I get a lot of compliments about my hair at work, especially about the length. They always compare it to how it used to look like when I started there in January 2009. I look at my photo ID, then look at the length I have reached now and I can definitely say I have come a long way. I can understand why some of my co-workers always comment about it getting so long!

These conversations about my locks always bring me back to the time when I first decided that I was going to embark on this wonderful journey. Although it might seem to be a no-brainer right now, I was going back and forth with this decision because I was concerned about my appearance in my place of employment, and if my new hairstyle would have an effect on my hopes for permanent employment in the company that I work for.

After a few months of deliberating, and with the support of circle of friends inside and outside of work, I went ahead with the decision, assuring myself that my work ethic, not my appearance (as long as I look neat and tidy) will get me to where I want to be in terms of employment. Fast-forward five years, my assurance definitely proved to be true.

My first attempt to lock my hair happened in November/December 2006…after getting the twists done, I thought they were too thick, so I combed out the coils, and had a co-worker re-twist them in January of 2007 (January 13th to be exact: my “dread-i-versary is coming up soon!). My decision to lock my hair was also influenced by the presence of people who looked like me in the office: black, driven, hilarious. My first couple of days into the locking process was a breeze- the coils looked freshly done, so I was able to wear it comfortably. It was only a few weeks afterwards where my hair was starting to get fuzzy, the beeswax (never touching that again) was getting all over the place, and my scalp was telling me something; I started to get nervous about my appearance.

I tried to find ways to make my newly formed locks look neater so that I would still look presentable to come into work; so I purchased a lot of scarves to hide the new growth but I still had nervous pangs about what management felt about me after making the decision to lock my hair. But as months flew by, and my locks began to take better form, I was able to get rid of the scarves and start styling my hair. As they grew longer, my self-consciousness about the process weaned…instead of people asking me why I decided to go this route, they say that this style suits me, and that I know how to wear them well, and this is management telling me this! I love how they notice when I try a new hairstyle- when I curl it, or do a style within a style!!!

Not too long after that, I ventured to another department to a new position, and then to another new and permanent position when I am currently in. I no longer worry about my locks affecting my ability to get another job for I have definitely learned that being a dedicated employee, who gets work done, and had future plans re: their employment are among some of the important qualities in getting to where you want to be. And, there are three of us in this branch who have locks!

I have been asked by a few individuals when I decided to lock my hair, and they would like to start their journey as well. The main question was: When is the most appropriate time to start locking your hair when you have just started a new job?
I normally respond by saying that one should start locking their hair when they feel ready to do so. Natural hair in the workplace has become widely expressed and accepted, and the misconceptions of having dreadlocks have slowly dissipated. Even though we may not see the natural hairstyles being greatly represented in the popular magazines, I have been seeing more and more locks, ‘fros and curlies walking in and around my workplace vicinity. So, I say that your hairstyle change (whether you’re doing the big chop or beginning your lock process) should not have an effect on your employment- as long as you look presentable, AND have a great work ethic. I know of some who prefer to keep their hair straight/unlocked/braided because of the jobs that they have, and so going that route would not be the greatest option (e.g. working at a place where every employee has to look and dress a particular way) I do understand that not every place of employment is the same, but many other offices, especially those that are very diverse, should encourage someone who wants that change to go ahead!

What are your thoughts? Do you feel comfortable in transitioning in your new/long-term place of employment? Given the “newfound” popularity of natural hair, would you find it easier to change it up?

All the More Reason To Keep it Natural!

2011-11-23T07:30:00.031-05:00

When I get into work, I normally go onto the Toronto Star’s online newspaper to see what’s happening in the city, province, and country. But this morning, I happened to see an article which spoke about the ingredients that can be found in many hair colouring products that can cause some detrimental damage to a human being.

The article is titled Hair Dye Ingredient Linked to Coma, Death- and it speaks about the “startling cases of suspected allergic reactions to hair dye” which has raised serious concerns about many hair colouring products. Some of the symptoms include swelling of the eyes, faces putted to twice their normal size, sudden collapse followed by a coma, and even death.

Allergic reaction caused by PPD: Courtesy of TheStar

Mrrk?!!!!!!!!!!
According to the star, a British woman has “been given an eight per cent chance of survival after she collapsed minutes afrer applying a home hair dye kit.”

It is said that the main culprit is a hair dye ingredient called paraphenylenediamine, or PPD, which is, according to the Star “a colourant present in an estimated two-thirds of hair dyes.” Furthermore, Health Canada, being the medium that has approved the use of PPD in products like hair colouring, is aware that it can cause harm to individuals, but has enforced companies that their products labels must include a clear warning to consumers of the “potential skin irritation.”
And you always wonder why there are always instructions on the product box to do a “patch test.”

Even though I say that I may stick to henna, it is said that PPD is found in the temporary black henna tattoos that are available almost anywhere. I’m not privy to having fake tattoos on various parts of my body (even if I already have tattoos), so I don’t have to deal with that too much. Note: there is a big difference between the temporary black henna tattoos and the henna dye that is used for hands and feet for weddings: that type of henna is purely natural.

I am not against using chemicals that colour the hair; I have just become more cautious of what products and chemicals I put into and on my body, for I never know what different/new product I may be allergic to. And I definitely do not want to experience the specific reactions that I have mentioned earlier in this post.

While we cannot avoid ALL use of products that have chemicals such as PPD, we do need to pay attention to and read the products warning labels that have been enforced by Health Canada and the National Institute of Health since we all don’t want to have a reaction like the poor lady in the picture.

Have you experienced any reactions while using hair colouring products? If so, what alternatives did you use to colour your hair?

Other sources about PPD:
- Henna For Hair
- Medscape
- World Allergy Organization

Advertisements on Natural Hair Products

2011-11-22T08:00:00.000-05:00

Okay- enough with the blues; the b-day blues, the "not doing it now" blues, the "when can find my smile again" blues. I've complained about it long enough, vented long enough about it, so I will have to tell myself that anything about my life developments will have to be POSITIVE from now on. So no more "sigh....here she goes again!" because I promise to put a positive kick to my posts.

*kicks the negativity away and dusts my shoulders*

AHEM....

Now back to some HAIR findings!

Even though I love reading the Essence and Ebony magazines on a monthly basis, I noticed a trend between the two when it came to advertisements on hair products. While flipping through the pages, I see that products like Pantene Pro-V, some more Pantene Pro-V, Dark and Lovely, (flips through some more pages) Garnier, Dr. Miracles, Luster's Pink, and Mizani.

From the November 2011 issue of Ebony

But, as I keep flipping towards the back of the magazines, past the horoscopes and the special advertising section, I start seeing advertisements for hair products from Carol's Daughter, Miss Jessie's, Kinky Curly, Tropical Roots and 4 Naturals. The products that we rant and rave about, the products that we naturalistas use to maintain the kinks in our hair, are in the back along with the ads that promote hour glass waistbands and pad-a-panty behinds!!! What's up with that?!

From what it looks like, magazines like Essence and Ebony still have a long way to go to promote natural hair. I have seen that Essence has been making the effort in promoting various hairstyles (and I'm happy to be seeing more of it now), especially on their online magazine site, but it is still very much a straight-haired magazine. And even though I haven't purchased a Sophisticate's Black Hair Style or a Hype Hair magazine in a very long time, when I did purchase an issue of SBHS or HH, I barely saw any natural hair photos or products in there...it may be a bit different now, but their audience is mostly women who relax/weave their hair.

If it weren't for the videos on youtube, and the many blogs that have tutorials on how to do a particular up-do, twist or wrap, or even a review on the best hair products out there, we would be absolutely clueless as to what to do with our hair! I would also like to see more magazines that are natural hair specific- there aren't many out there that you can pick up at a store, but there are online magazines available such as The Natural Haven, Naptural Roots Magazine, Loc'd Life Magazine and I will be on the search for more to check out.

What are your thoughts of the natural hair products being advertised on the last pages of the magazines? Do you feel they are back there because of the popularity of larger scale companies/less advertising funds/popularity issues?

Do you know of any more natural hair magazines- hard copy or online? If so, let me know!

So- in light of POSITIVE THOUGHT, I'm going to leave you with a quote that I found on Clutch Magazine today:

“No one can go back and make a brand new start. Anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.” - Unknown

Have a blessed day everyone!

Birthday Blues?

2011-11-21T10:00:00.000-05:00

I'm not at all excited that it's my birthday.

As the days got closer to this day, I actually started to dread the fact that it was quickly approaching, and that I didn't have the desire to celebrate what so ever.

It's funny- I look at my previous birthday blog posts and the one that truly stood out was one for my 25th birthday. I spoke about my personal achievements, and moving forward to something greater as I get older.

I said (~~I can't believe I'm quoting myself~~) that "….at 25, I’m planning to enjoy me as ME, Nubian Soul, Lady Scorpion, Black-a-licious, Rowena. My plan is not to regret anything from now on." I was clearly on a mission to make my life better and brighter than it has ever been. Three years ago, I said that "This is my official promise to myself, and I plan to keep this promise," and right now, I kind of feel as if I completely failed at keeping my promise of getting to where I want to be.

Although I have come a long way this year, by achieving the things that I put off for so long, and trying things that I never thought I would have the guts to do, but I still feel incomplete. I feel as if more could be done, and that I'm falling back into the slow lane, which is totally not the route I want to go back to.

Yesterday, I found an article called What to Know When You're 25(ish) by Relevant Magazine, which spoke about things that we should really care about in our 20s. It spoke about having a job and figuring out the kind of work that you love to do; the article spoke about the seriousness of being in a relationship and that "some of the most life-shaping decisions you make in this season will be about walking away from good-enough, in search of can’t-live-without"; going to counselling so that you can "unravel the knots that keep you from living a healthy whole life"; and finding a church that you love, "no matter how different it is from the one you were a part of growing up."

The three words that really got to me in this article was as follows: Don't Get Stuck.
And that's how I'm feeling, once again. The feeling of letting life pass me by (here we go again!)

In the article it says that when you start to hit 28 or 30, everything starts to divide and that you can see very clearly two kinds of people. The first type are the ones who "used their 20s to learn and grow," they are "people who know what works and what doesn’t" and "who have pushed through to become real live adults." The second type of people are ones who "who are hanging onto college, or high school even, with all their might. They’ve stayed in jobs they hate, because they’re too scared to get another one. They’ve stayed with men or women who are good but not great, because they don’t want to be lonely. They mean to find a church, they mean to develop honest, intimate friendships, they mean to stop drinking like life is one big frat party. But they don’t do those things, so they live in kind of an extended adolescence, no closer to adulthood than they were when they graduated college."

Looking at this article makes me wonder if I'm that first person or second. In one aspect, I know for a fact that I am learning and growing (not to the speed at which I would like), but at the same time, even though I am capable of moving on to better, brighter and greater things, I tend to hold back because of fear of failure and rejection.

The article continued by saying that one should never be stuck, and that in order to move forward we must walk away and try something new, and also take a risk. This is a time to "become, believe, and try," and that you should not "spend time with people who make you feel like less than you are."

It then concluded by saying something that I found most important: "Don’t get stuck in the past, and don’t try to fast-forward yourself into a future you haven’t yet earned. Give today all the love and intensity and courage you can, and keep traveling honestly along life’s path."

After reading this article, I felt a tad better and I realized that moping about feeling stuck all the time is not and will not get me anywhere, especially in terms of developing into a better individual. Earlier this year I created a vision board about things that I needed to do, and now it's about time that I update that board by including additional goals/feats/aspirations that I want to conquer. I may have a flat tire right now, but with the correct repairs, I'll be back in the fast lane. I may have the birthday blues right now, but I hope I have something to write about that is completely different next year.

Le Sigh...

Do Onto Others...

2011-11-18T08:00:00.000-05:00

Diversity: Courtesy of http://saeedselvam.ca/

I love diversity.

I love how the city of Toronto consists of citizens that come from various parts of the world; I love seeing the way different cultures celebrate their religious holidays, weddings and cultural events. I love going into a Japanese restaurant for all-you-can-eat sushi, or even an Chinese-Hakka restaurant for chili chicken without having to worry they will take my order or not.

I love seeing various cultures playing Mas at Caribana. What can get better than that?

What I am NOT comfortable with are the individuals who feel that the newcomers should throw away what they have valued back in their home country and abide by what's deemed as "normal" here. Of course, every new and old citizen must abide by the laws that have been enforced on us by the government, no question about that. But to discriminate against others because of their practices, that disgusts me.

Let me give you an example: Christmas is fast approaching and everyone is holding get togethers ranging from a games night, wine and dine, or a potluck. Now, just saying the event being held is at a place where there are many folks from all races, creeds and religions either working or living at a building. Being fully aware that all folks may not follow the religion, but are greatly interested in attending the event, wouldn't it be safe to call this event a holiday party?

I would think so.

So what if someone feels as if they are offended because they are changing the name from "Christmas" party to "holiday" party and starts hurling offences indicating that Christmas shouldn't be ruined for the Christians because other religions are now in the picture? And if they feel uncomfortable with the notion and importance of this holiday, they can go (insert explicit context), saying that it is not fair that Christians must change their views to accommodate the other religions.

Blood boiling...

Now, is this an act or insensitivity, ignorance or plain stupidity? If this person was a genuine Christian, they would know and understand Matthew 7:12, which says "So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets," and Galatians 5:14, which says "Love your neighbour as yourself" (both verses are from the NIV). The true Christian way is to love everyone as they are; even if they look and act differently. In this day and age, especially in this city called Toronto, everyone will interact with someone who practices a different religion- but that should never be something that determines whether or not the person is of "lesser value" than you are. Simple-mindedness and ignorance, yes, but religion and culture, never.

If you really don't have something nice to say, just shut it. Simple. Don't offend others because of your sheer ignorance to something "different"

That is all.

Oil in de coil: From the Inside!

2011-11-17T08:00:00.022-05:00

Biotin and MSM Supplements

One of the best ways to take care of your body, and promote the growth of your hair is to nourish your body by taking supplements, eating the right foods, and drinking plenty of water. It becomes harder to see a positive change in your system if you are continuously consuming fatty foods that are high in fat, sugar, salt and cholesterol. By consuming an excess amount of these foods, your body tends to work in overtime trying to process these elements rather than providing the right nutrients for the body. Your body would rather want to slow down instead generate the necessary energy to help your body grow.

One should not consume vitamins in the hopes that it would replace the foods that they are not eating. Its supposed to be a supplement, not a replacement. Some are there to assist you when you have an extremely low amount in your system (i.e. Iron deficiency) but I want to speak about the ones that help promote growth for the hair. There are two natural supplements which help with hair growth, and just like the use of the Jamaican Black Castor Oil, change does not happen overnight, there's a lot of patience and diligence involved; they are Biotin and MSM, also known as Methylsulfonylmethane.

What benefits do they provide, might you ask?

I found articles on WHFoods and WebMD, which spoke about the use of Biotin and the benefits that comes with it. WHFoods describes biotin as the component also known as vitamin H. When an individual is deficient in biotin, they may experience hair loss (alopecia) as a symptom (symptoms also include skin-related problems such as cradle-cap in infants and seborrhic dermatitis). WebMD notes that "Biotin is a major component in the natural hair manufacturing process -- it is essential to not only grow new hair, but it also plays a major role in the overall health of skin and nails." According to WebMD, it is recommended that the daily dosage of Biotin for individuals should be a minimum of 2mg.

For those who prefer to go the more traditional route by consuming foods that are rich in vitamins, WH Foods composed a list of foods that have excellent sources of biotin:

-Chard (excellent)

-Tomatoes (excellent)

-Romaine Lettuce (excellent)

-Carrots (excellent)

-Almonds (very good)

-Chicken Eggs (very good)

-Onions (very good)

-Cabbage (very good)

-Cucumber (very good)

-Cauliflower (very good)

-Goat's Milk (good)

-Cow's Milk (good)

-Raspberries (good)

-Strawberries (good)

-Halibut (good)

-Oats (good)

-Walnuts (good)

Then there is Methylsulfonylmethane (MSM). I was made aware of this vitamin by looking at a post written by Curly Nikki called The 411 on MSM- Natural Hair Growth Supplement, where it was explained that "the main ingredient in MSM is sulfur- one of the principle building blocks of hair (and nails)." and that "MSM helps hair growth because it gives your body a building block for hair. But besides just contributing one of the main building blocks of hair, it is also theorized that MSM increases hair growth potential by lengthening the growth phase (anagen phase) of the hair cycle." According to TLC, it is said that "Some physicians even say that MSM helps your body build collagen, the protein that keeps skin and hair supple" and that "MSM occurs naturally in several foods, such as pine nuts and milk, which has led to speculation that people with some food allergies can't take MSM supplements (one has to be very mindful of that factor).

I have been using vitamins that already have biotin as the picture above illustrates, but I bought the MSM capsules at my nearby Healthy Planet food store. I have only been using that for just under 2 weeks so I will have to be patient in order to see a significant change

We must always note that, the use of supplements should not act as a replacement; for the consumption of healthy foods such as legumes, fish, fruits and meat, and less consumption of foods that are high in salt and sugar (e.g. Miss Vickie's, Timbits) will make a difference in the health of your body. Also, drinking more water, and tea (such as green tea, which is full of antioxidants) would make much more of a difference if you were solely drinking sodas, caramel lattes and alcohol.

Ease up on the complicated drinks!

As I mentioned before, even though you may nourish your hair from the outside, it is always important to be mindful of what you are putting inside in order to see/feel more of a difference.

What kind of vitamins do you consume on a daily basis? Do you use biotin and MSM supplements for your hair? Have you noticed a difference so far?